The Xbox “Like God of War But” Game

Veni, vidi, vici

In the research for this topic, by way of the magic coincidence, former developers at Crytek have sprang from the woodwork and the coffin to announce that Ryse: Sone of Rome was something of an experiment. Those who recall the Xbox One launch title might be thinking, “Well, it was supposed to show off the Xbox One’s stellar capabilities,” and you’re right. It was, and it did… adequately.

I’ve been on PC since the COVID pandemic was classified as an outbreak at first in late-November 2019, but even then I was lamenting the absence of disk drives in PCs and laptops well before then… (T^T)

Seems the devs really wanted to turn Ryse into something of an answer to Assassin’s Creed if you forget the animus and the rotten Frenchness of the franchise. Unfortunately, as Yahtzee Croshaw put it, it’s more of an amalgamation of the movie The Eagle stitched together with Gladiator, developed in the same room with someone playing God of War. A Rome-flavored hack-y, slash-y, gladius attack-y revenge story that scratches the back of he who wanted Rome, replete with a lot of the mystical mythical flare that makes it so magical to us Westerners, an influence for the countless European empires that rebuilt and succeeded upon it (there was still a Roman Empire in the area, you know ಠ_ಠ), and like God of War [but], it has its own inaccuracies focused largely on the people and history than on the mythology, as well as the mechanics of Roman military history.

The main antagonist behind the grand plot is Emperor Nero…

Technically not him. The Nero depicted in game wasn’t this infamous neckbeard. The devs made him an old man.

The real life Nero never made it this far in his life. His declining popularity, fueled by instances like the taxes, the Senate, and the Great Fire of Rome, made him an enemy of his own government. Funny enough, the regular folks loved him, unless they were the first Christians in the world. One thing to note that has since been debunked is the fiddle aspect of the Roman fire. As a noun, it doesn’t make sense since fiddles were centuries away from conception and invention when the event took place, and as a verb, it’s more plausible linguistically, but not as a way to describe his actions during the incident. Since he was a “man of the people,” the myth largely started from his history as an actor in plays. A normal Roman citizen would’ve laughed along with such a relatable young man, but a patrician would walk away in disgust… only for Nero to respond with a death threat or a giant tax on the Senate that would go back to the people. Populism, everyone!

Greco-Roman plays of the time did, and likely still do, use music for scene changes and Nero the “best” lyre player would certainly give a lot of slander material to later historians like Suetonius and Cassius Dio, but they really just hated his aversion to tradition in favor of the regular Roman citizen. Funny enough, our modern view of giving back to community is not in line with the Roman view. So that’s the upper-class vitriol against Nero, what about the Christians?

Early Christianity was without the many protections. A major world religion as of 2026 and onwards, the inception of the teachings of Jesus of Nazareth were not immediately loved by all. In fact, the early hostility to Christianity was due in large part to the novelty and the cult-like secrecy surrounding the movement’s practices, which stands in contrast to how Rome viewed the religion it broke off from: Judaism. With a millennia-plus of scripture, theology, and lore, Rome tolerated the Jews more so than the Christians, especially since Christians were these new, unfamiliar peoples without an established tradition yet, but above all, polytheism was the king. Like Jupiter/Jove.

How different is he from Zeus? starts building the crucifix †

As for other inaccuracies, Boudicca makes an appearance as another antagonist.

Going back to that unbiased source, Cassius Dio, she can be broadly transcribed to the modern tongue as a 5’7″ ginger baritone warrior queen. But that’s not what the game gave us.

The game instead gifted us a dirty blonde 5’4″ warrior princess… who somehow had access to war elephants… in f[Oi!]king Roman Britain!! She also didn’t have a husband named Prasutagus in the game, instead being the daughter of Briton king Oswald. For context, Oswald is a Germanic name, and nothing resembling German, or more accurately the Saxons, would feel up that British lass off the coast of Europe for another few centuries. The Romans would certainly be eyeing up Caledonia as a hazard to defend against, which necessitated Hadrian’s Wall approximately 60-odd years later, and the Antonine reinforcement 20 years after that.

And circling back to Nero being an old man, how about his two sons, Basilius and Commodus? If your first thought is, Nero had no kids, then congratulations, you too think too much of the Roman Empire.

You also haven’t seen any sunlight. I know it’s July, but get a tan. And if you already have one, get a deeper one. Look like a ganguro in this joint, Stan.

Commodus was indeed a Roman Emperor, made popular by Joaquin the Phoenix against Russell Crowe’s Maximus Decimus Meridius, father to a murdered son, and husband to a murdered wife. But immediately following Nero’s sheathing of a blade into his own throat in a classical antiquity assisted suicide case, there were four emperors in just one year–a pattern that won’t follow until the Third Century Crisis. And no, Commodus wasn’t that immediate a successor; the Flavian dynasty and four emperors from the Nerva-Antonine dynasty would precede Commodus himself.

Since we’re on this Rome trip, tell me your favorite emperors. My alias of Tiberius Little would be a dead giveaway, and Tiberius is indeed up there…

…but years of playing Civilization VI have warmed me up to Traianus Caesar.

\(^-^)/

But whether he’s an anachronistic son of a reimagined infamous emperor, or himself the emperor, Commodus always has been and always will be depicted as a vain motherf[Deus!]ker. So they got that part right.

Basilius now!

Like Boudicca’s dad, “Oswald,” this guy doesn’t exist. In fact, in my research, I’d learned that Basilius is another anachronism linguistically. It’s a later Latinization of the Greek “Basileus” which refers to “king” or “monarch,” and calling your son this in the dead of Imperial Rome should make a kingmaker general (of which Rome had many by this point) or an irate Senator in collusion with a Praetorian commander should mark you and your line for death by numerous stabbings Julius Caesar style.

Et tu, Brute?? (ToT)

And on the Greek note, Basileus wouldn’t become a thing for anything Roman until the 7th century. The entire time I was researching this, I kept thinking of General Belisarius of Justinian’s court. But unlike that guy, Basilius in the game is nothing short of a putz. His own damn level is extravagance on steroids.

Boy, wasn’t that fun?

Now picking this game apart like the vulture I am, don’t be so quick to ~~walk away~~ assume that I’m out for blood and that I hate this game. I tolerate this game the same way the Soviets and the Nazis tolerated each other.

How many times did these two countries eat Poland? angry Polish noises (╯‵□′)╯︵┻━┻

It plays around with Roman history the same way God of War used to play around with Greek mythology before Kratos left Rome with crumbs to munch on kicked around in Egypt, then Scandinavia about a thousand years later.

I’M GREEK, N-GGA!!

Ryse is also one of the major games that puts us in the caligae of a Roman soldier. Most other games focus on systems, the economy, managing regions like a god, and certainly lending credence to the whole “the world is a simulation” theory, though that belongs more to The Sims than anything.

Hollywood will give us as many movies as we want and don’t want about Rome, but the gaming sphere seems more reliant on indies who’ll gladly fall back on the Total War structure than something Ryse or Like God of War ~~But~~. And there’s a few theories for why that is.

For starters, which Rome do you mean? The underrepresented Kingdom? The moderately reported-on Republic? Or the jizzed-all-over Empire?

The Kingdom can lean more into the mythological aspect with record keeping and archaeological digs being scarce. Think Japan’s Emperor Jimmu. Did he exist? The Chrysanthemum Throne says yes, but historicity puts better emphasis on either Kinmei or Yuryaku. Likewise, historians have more to glean from the actual Republic than the Kingdom, but depending on where the Kingdom sits next to contemporary states, that’s ripe for a video game. It can also contextualize the Roman aversion to the terms kingdom or monarchy.

From a financial standpoint, a Rome-themed game would be horrifically expensive. Just like the historical state, you can’t really build a Rome-themed game without drowning in debt and Jupiter help you if you have to resort to debasing silver to keep the numbers looking sexy on the taxes. Caleb Hammer would be most displeased.

(/_<) Oddio…

You also face two dilemmas: historically accurate Rome? Or romanticized Rome? Fans expect one, but historians will treat it the same way they treated Ridley Scott’s Napoleon. On the other hand, historians would love nothing more than a look at how well the fortifications and Roman foreign policy played such as their game of Chinese whispers with the eastern empire of Serica (China) which is either a series of half-truths and fabrications or proof of some kind of mutual respect and suspicion that befits states this vast for the period and beyond.

Sadly, the real history gets little respect.

Recent reports shed light on the financial disparities Crytek faced in the development stage. Just to get it onto a disc or code, several chunks had to be hacked off the game before it was considered “sellable,” and even the numbers it pulled in were rather meager. 1.3 million copies sold and it couldn’t match what the devs really wanted.

That said, if it did rake in the dough it was expecting, it certainly could’ve led to a setting in other areas. Vikings, ancient China, Japan, probably Egypt. Instead, that fell on Ubisoft after Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey, and unfortunately for the rest of Crytek, the German and British offices saw months go by before they saw a single euro or pound.

Crytek is still in business though and Ryse was recently listed on sale for PC on Steam… and I just bought and downloaded it!

If you’re up for it, give it a whirl!

Next week’s post is gonna be delayed a little as I’m going to be on leave from the 24th to the 31st. Actually, the post after that would also be delayed. So for a sneak peek: Chainsaw Chopping Chupa Chups Cheerleader after July 24: