Author: Tiberius

Here, you will find a variety of opinions in anything and everything concerning entertainment. Movies, games, animation, music, TV; if it's a form of entertainment consumed by many, I may have written about it or I plan to do so in the future. Unless otherwise specified, expect weekly updates each Friday.

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Beautifully Blursed

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Supernatural music references

This one is a long-time coming. One of my posts from January of this year included a still frame of a JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure episode that has since been used as one of the countless memes in many anime circles online. For those who need a refresher, it’s not the one where the character Dire feigns incompetence to catch his enemy in a move known as the Thunder Cross Split Attack. Instead, it’s the one where a character named Pesci, notable for his lack of a neck cries in excitement that someone or something took his bait. Example:

The picture I used months ago was larger than that. But swinging back to my point. I won’t be the first person to speak about the JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure series, nor will I expect to be the first person to introduce it to those who haven’t heard of it or were on the fence before. But even if this is the millionth time you’ve heard or read about the series with no clear distinction on whether to see it in action, let me remove the ambiguity: I can’t recommend the series highly enough. I write this with the enthusiasm of a tourist coming back from the best vacation spot ever.

For an introduction, I’m going to try my best to spoil none of the manga or the anime. JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure belongs to the long list of longest running manga series still in production while also sitting on the list of most difficult series to adapt as an anime. For context, the first chapter debuted in December of 1986 with the first volume releasing later in 1987. The modern anime series that you might see on streaming sights like TubiTV or Crunchyroll or even Toonami in the west debuted in April of 2012. There’s a reason for the nearly quarter-century gap between manga and anime and it comes from the way the manga is structured. Artistically, the manga artist, Hirohiko Araki looked more towards Greco-Roman and Renaissance art for inspiration, western fashion magazines, and during the production of the earlier parts of the manga, the days’ most popular musicians to include Michael Jackson, Prince, the Beatles, the Police, and countless others.

The manga itself is divided into nine parts or arcs that center on a different protagonist within the same lineage.

Part 1: Phantom Blood ran from January to October of 1987 and takes place in Victorian England. The protagonist is burgeoning gentleman Jonathan Joestar and the antagonist is his stepbrother Dio Brando.

Part 2: Battle Tendency ran from November 1987 to March 1989 and takes place fifty years later, centering on Jonathan’s grandson Joseph, who is far more rascally and mischievous than his grandfather. The antagonist this time is a trio of ancient Aztec beings known as the Pillar Men named Esidisi, Wamuu, and Kars.

Part 3: Stardust Crusaders ran from the same month the last part ended until April 1992 and this time the protagonist is Japanese delinquent Jotaro Kujo. It begins in Tokyo in the late 1980s, and the antagonist this time is Dio once again, but he’s come back with an upgrade, his name is capitalized as DIO, and this time he has a wider cadre of henchmen in different parts of the world.

Part 4: Diamond is Unbreakable is set about a decade after the events of the last part. It ran from May of 1992 to December 1995 and features the protagonist Josuke Higashikata. He’s also a delinquent but by the late 1990s, Japanese delinquent culture was losing favor to the emerging gyaru culture to follow in the 2000s. Still, Josuke’s not as rough as Jotaro so long as you don’t badmouth his immaculate hair.

Part 4 is also centered in a fictional town modeled after Araki’s real life home in Sendai and is thus less of a high stakes thriller than the other parts, but there is still an antagonist in the form of department store employee and serial killer Yoshikage Kira.

Part 5: Golden Wind/Vento Aureo also began the same month the previous part ended and ended in April of 1999. It’s set in Spring 2001 around the southern half of the Italian peninsula and features the illegitimate son of DIO, Giorno Giovanna. The antagonist is the mob boss of the Passione mob, Diavolo. Without spoiling much, instead of cooling down like the last part and gradually sprints into its second wind for the plot.

Part 6: Stone Ocean ran from December of 1999 to April 2003 and features the first female protagonist, Jolyne Cujoh/Kujo, the daughter of Jotaro. Its setting this time is in a Florida prison in late 2011 and the antagonist is the prison’s chaplain and protege of DIO himself, Father Enrico Pucci. This part specifically along with Part 5 suffered from a long streak of unpopularity until the Part 6 anime adaptation was announced online in April of 2021. I covered that as it happened in another blog that I started two years ago and needless to say, it was one of the rare moments of hype I’ve ever felt for an upcoming product or series continuation of the sort.

Part 7: Steel Ball Run is set in an alternate continuity and sets the clock back to the 1890s but with a different protagonist who pays homage to the original British Jonathan Joestar. It begins in the western U.S. and ran in Weekly Shonen Jump magazine from January to October 2004 before switching to the more seinen demographic magazine of Ultra Jump for the remainder of its publication from March 2005 to April 2011. The protagonist is Johnny Joestar, a disabled ex-jockey and the antagonist is the 23rd President of the United States, not Benjamin Harrison like in real life, but Union Army cavalryman Funny Valentine.

Part 8: JoJolion (the -lion pronounced the same as in “Evangelion”) was actually set during the modern day. It ran from May 2011 to August 2021 and does almost quite what Part 4 does, supplanting Sendai with the fictional town of Morioh, but uses a real-world disaster as part of its setting. In Spring 2011, an earthquake struck the east coast of the Tohoku region of Japan. It features a similarly named protagonist to Josuke Higashikata from Part 4 (who also has a distant connection to the first guy), but differentiated by way of a different kanji in Japanese, and radically different circumstances. Like the rest of the plot, this time around it’s a more complicated affair with complicated characters and motives who run into each other. As such, the antagonist isn’t easily defined and is absent for a majority of the run, at least until the end.

Part 9: The JOJOLands is the most recent edition to the JoJo saga and is still in production as of this writing. In fact, it just started in February. It’s set in Hawaii in the modern day and its protagonist is Jodio Joestar.

At the outset, this sounds like a lot to get through because it is, but the modern anime adaptation is the best representation of the events in the manga. There have been attempts to adapt it a few years after the first two arcs had concluded with OVAs from the 90s until 2002, a movie from 2007, and in the case of translations that front was even more troubled.

This is one of many examples of troubled attempts to translate the manga from Japanese to English. The problem in this case is that it wasn’t done professionally and Araki, consciously or unconsciously, hasn’t been as definitive in providing details and context until he was interviewed at different points during the production of the manga. For the panel above, which takes place in the middle of Part 4’s run, it was translated from Japanese to English in Taiwan, and the translations were so subpar that for many trying to get into the series, even illegally, had to wade through bad grammar and language until it was given a proper re-publication for the international market in the years leading up to and following the 2012 anime adaptation.

Part 5 had a similar issue back in the day as well and was a large part of its initial disdain from the community until re-publications with better translations rectified the mistakes. And mistakes would follow on even after this. Araki himself is also inconsistent with color schemes when it comes to coloring in the manga, then again, a lot of the monochrome manga is up to interpretation which explains why some characters are colored differently in the anime adaptations than their depictions in the manga.

This example was used as a meme in r/ShitpostCrusaders, but is an example of the degree of freedom afforded to publishers and distributors in the case of JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. Thankfully, these days it’s gotten exceptionally easier to start JoJo and however you get there, love it or not, it’ll leave a lasting impression.

The art styles of the characters, as I mentioned before aren’t the same as most manga in either the 1980s or even now. It’s art style is a bit of a beefier and more elaborate type found in Berserk, Fist of the North Star, Rokudenashi Blues, or even Yu Yu Hakusho. On reflection, it reminds me of some of the comics from the west like Martin Mystere or the erotic series Druuna, and it’s like that on purpose.

Ever since he debuted as a manga artist, Araki has looked at western styles for inspiration and just about any western artist does well for him, even the ones we learn about like Leonardo da Vinci or Michelangelo.

In anime/manga communities, the term for someone who consumes copious amounts of Japanese media and entertainment, not always limited to manga and anime itself is known as a weeaboo or weeb for short. The term began as an insult in the mid-2000s on forum sites like 4chan and at the time anime hadn’t taken as much of a grip as it does today. Now that the internet is what it is today, the opposite end of the spectrum is the “westaboo,” a term for a Japanese person who consumes more than the doctor’s recommended weight in western comics and cartoons, which would make Araki one of the first to be described as such. And since this appears to be the case, I’d like to be the fly on the wall of a bunch of Japanese internet users having their own dub vs. sub debate on King of the Hill which I learned recently is also popular in Japan.

We’ve come full circle now!

Not limited to just appearances, Araki also looks to music for inspiration. Earlier in this post, you may recall the names of the antagonists of Part 2 are Esidisi, Wamuu and Kars. These are direct references to the real life bands AC/DC, Wham!, and The Cars. This has become one of the numerous features of the JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure series since the beginning. Direct references to artists by name or characters in the books.

This is an interesting source of controversy for the series with specific artists and their estates or just the record labels that worked with them in the past getting uppity over their depictions. It’s also worth noting how complicated this gets in the case of copyright laws the world over, not just in Japan. Because of this, international distribution has had to put in the legwork censoring or altering or requesting alterations from Araki’s team to be able to distribute it in select countries. As an example, there have been more direct references to Michael Jackson and Prince as people than through characters or concepts. The reasons for this come down to when both men were still alive, they were both likely to use the courts to their advantage. I doubt Prince’s estate has kept that up since, but the Jackson family still lives and ex-members of the Jackson five for example can definitely waste that much time, money, and effort in a drawn out legal battle just to change a joke character on page 36 of the 17th volume in the manga. That’s a joke, but it’d be one hell of a read in a newspaper or on the associated wiki. Speaking of which, here’s a link to that:

https://jojowiki.com/JoJo_Wiki

One of the more iconic moments of the JoJo series comes in the supernatural abilities. Parts 1 and 2 begin with an ability known as “Hamon” or the Ripple in English. It functions as an ability that can harness a power similar to that of the sun. Its name derives from the ripples that appear in liquids and its mirroring of the sun’s power makes it an effective tool against vampires. After Part 3, Hamon is mostly done away with in favor of the Stand.

Stands are different from Hamon in the sense that they’re physical representations of one’s soul and can appear in diverse ways. The most common appearance they take is a ghostly humanoid form that stands beside its user and their powers, but can appear is different things; animals, plants, a gun, vehicles, concepts–the sky’s the limit. The only caveat is that only a Stand user can see another Stand, but they impact everyone. So you don’t have to be a Stand user to come under the impact or influence of one. For example, a Stand user who can control the weather can theoretically make it rain or snow on command. When they first debuted in Part 3, they took the names of Tarot cards and Egyptian gods before taking the names of music or musicians.

Following the successful 2012 adaptation, it’s hard to imagine western distribution of anime without JoJo, but the in-between years have a bunch of eye-catching references that a trained eye can find on review. It wasn’t until the most recent and currently produced adaptation that the JoJo’s reach became international and for better or worse, JoJo fans have taken the JoJo’s reference far beyond its roots. Copypastas, poses, iconic characters, parodies; you could sneeze and it would be a JoJo’s reference. Minor spoiler, but that’s also not a joke. On Reddit, there’s two dedicated subreddits centered around the franchise. For fanart, discussions, analyses, and announcements, there’s r/StardustCrusaders, and for memes and meme-related events, there’s the aforementioned r/ShitpostCrusaders.

As hard as it was for JoJo to make it to the west, now that it’s here, the newer debate comes in the form of where to start and how to start. Reading about that sounds absurd. If you’ve never heard of JoJo, but know that it’s divided into parts, your first thought would probably be to start at Part 1. The reason this debate exists is because different people have different opinions on certain parts. Similar to how there are beloved and reviled episodes of a certain cartoon or TV show. Some people will recommend different parts for different reasons revolving around plot and concept and others will recommend starting at the beginning, myself included, so as to get the entirety of the story.

If you want to hear it from me, I’ll start off with how I got into JoJo. It began with Toonami acquiring the license to air Part 3 in 2016 when I was in high school.

Stardust Crusaders was divided into two parts for the anime the Road to Egypt arc and the Battle in Egypt arc. In the middle of the second arc, one of the episodes begins with a character at gunpoint attempting to warn his comrades that an old enemy is back to challenge them and he does this by pointing his tongue in the shape of an arrow.

The art style put me off at first, but I started watching it and watching it even more until eventually, we reached the climax at the end of the arc. I wound up looking for it on YouTube where there are loads of videos in segments and/or playlists, and rewatching it with my fullest attention, made Stardust Crusaders one of my most favorite parts in JoJo.

That being said, the way the other parts are structured might shape your opinion on the part as a whole. As much as I recommend Part 3, I also highly recommend beginning at Part 1 and judging for yourself as you go along. The most recent part to get adapted to the anime was Stone Ocean in December 2021 which finished its batch release in December 2022. So whatever your watch pace, wherever you finish you can look at sources like Mangadex to start on Part 7. The black and white manga isn’t hard to find and recently, fans as well as the distributor Shueisha have been coloring the manga but it isn’t always perfect. All of the anime is also dubbed in English, so there’s pretty much no wrong way to get into JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. Even if you begin somewhere in the middle, you can also go back to an earlier part or skim through the wiki for a better understanding of an arc or concept.

One more thing before I go:

Just about any frame in the series, anime or manga, can be used as a meme if you’re creative enough. But for the love of all things holy, do not under any circumstances consume the series through just memes. The series is tough to read or watch as it is, and out of context memes don’t help with comprehension. For the most part, those are for people who do understand the series well enough to joke about it. I recommend the wiki and several JoJo-based YouTubers who can explain it in a concise fashion if you’re lost. And you might get lost on the way.

Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars: A Callback to the 2D Era

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2D graphics in the HD world

Whether you play it or not, you likely know at least a few things about the Grand Theft Auto series: 1) it’s pretty much an organized crime simulator, 2) it’s violently comedic, 3) and the character Big Smoke exists to this day as a meme machine.

The more knowledgeable of you may also know some fun facts about the series as a whole, not the least of which involves the series’ humble beginnings. The concept of the game was under the working title of Race ‘n’ Chase with a release date set for sometime in 1997 by Scottish developers DMA Design. The original goal was top-down street racing with an added bonus of a police response that would become common for series like Midnight Club and Need for Speed.

The point of divergence for the concept was a tough-to-patch glitch. The police cars were extraordinarily relentless in pursuit of the player and most of the time, the devs couldn’t correct the issue, so instead they decided to team up with the madness and make it an action-adventure game retitled Grand Theft Auto. Across all the games, the skeleton of the objective is the same: the protagonist changes with each game, but they’re all tasked with completing a set of tasks for increasingly high payment with proportional risk to the player. As the games progress, the player unlocks new weapons, safe houses, locations, and in some cases clothing options. The police wanted level has influenced the game and others across the industry — the response is often proportional to the crime from mild disturbances having a single cop car investigating to high level crimes involving stand-ins for real life federal agencies like the FBI. Up until GTA V took away one of the stars, the military would be called for the highest wanted level of six stars all just to take you down. A look on YouTube may find you some compilation videos of the police partaking in the Darwin Awards, or interestingly analysis videos on the police in GTA games. My favorite comes from Game Theory where they experimented on whether real-life instances of brutality have been programmed into the game. In a serious tone, this is a debate best suited for a platform better equipped to make comment on it, so this is more of a comedic tone.

GTA and GTA 2 in 1999 were both 2D games despite the late 1990s being the era of the emerging 3D graphics market. Almost every developer was launching a video game with full 3D graphics with resounding success stories like Medal of Honor and GoldenEye 007 coupled with lackluster releases like Mortal Kombat 4 and what would’ve been Star Fox 2 if it came out on time.

One can argue that Grand Theft Auto III’s 2001 release was somewhat later than what was expected of games at the time as RockStar’s formula is to one-up itself with each new release and GTA III came swinging at the hip, guns ablaze. The graphics and mechanics at the time set the stage for a ginormous change all throughout the gaming industry and one of the first notable examples of GTA’s influence was the many clones, though I doubt the men in charge of RockStar cared all that much. Leslie Benzies and the Houser Bros., Sam and Dan, were busy making games and as shameless as some of the clones were, taking elements from a proven success story isn’t the end of the world. Other devs could do what they wanted while RockStar Games released, 2002’s GTA Vice City, 2004’s GTA San Andreas (which to this day is the reason the PS2 sold well over 150 million units), 2006’s Vice City Stories — one of two underrated GTA games that I talked about months ago on this blog, and one of the most expensive games at the time, 2008’s GTA IV.

Coupled with DLC content in the form of The Lost and Damned and The Ballad of Gay Tony expansions, GTA IV signified a change in the GTA series. The HD era was upon us and the next generation of consoles was its home. Better graphics, a more serious tone, new mechanics, and reimagined cities and locales. GTA IV’s Liberty City looked more like the Big Apple than its 3D rendition, and a lot of small details from older games have remained unchanged or were tweaked to fit the era.

As we all know, RockStar’s prize success story is that of GTA V in 2013, which reimagines Los Angeles and some surrounding areas in the HD universe, but before that, there was another HD game in the 2D style: Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars.

I was originally going to mention how much of a difference there is between this game and the two GTAs released before and after it, but every GTA game differs in some capacity so that would’ve been a useless metric for the game. The basic plot of this game involves Hong Kong immigrant Huang Lee who flies to Liberty City and is welcomed with violence. He arrived in the city to deliver a sword to his uncle Wu “Kenny” Lee, but things turned sideways when he was ambushed at the airport, so now he has to work to make up for the loss of the sword. Obviously, there’s more to this story and if you want to look at the series from beginning to end, The Professional, GTASeriesVideos (a RockStar fan channel), and Willzyyy are your best sources of gameplay on YouTube along with some other channels.

Now the plot is the standard, started at the bottom, now we’re here fare, but the most notable difference was that when it released in March of 2009, Nintendo allowed RockStar to publish it on the DS.

Yeah, the same company that heavily censored Mortal Kombat in the 1990s and lives and breathes by Super Mario and Kirby allowed a notoriously violent video game on one of their star handheld platforms. Granted, 2000s Nintendo was far removed from 1990s Nintendo. There was still the family-friendly image on the face of the company, but at this point Nintendo was letting the chains loosen a bit on the family friendly image by allowing Ultimate Mortal Kombat 3 to be played on the DS as well. It’s a large company with a large history, run by a council of suits and while there’s nothing detailing how this arrangement came to be in detail, the main connecting element is extensive use of the touchscreen function in some manner.

This might have been part of the deal to get certain types of games on the Nintendo DS: design it in a way that the touchscreen doesn’t go ignored, and while that works well for touch games like the Touchmaster series, third parties are hit and miss. From best use to worst use in my personal experience, it’s Chinatown Wars at best, Mortal Kombat in the middle, and Call of Duty at the worst. Or rather just awkward for that last one.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d say the rest of that deal included a lap dance of some sort. For Chinatown Wars, it might be a good example of a game whose mechanics are tied to the touchscreen, but not necessarily dependent on that feature. Certain minigames and combat sequences make good use of the feature and it flows naturally enough into gameplay that you won’t really notice it as much half the time. Don’t quote me on this, but I don’t think this was actually the first time a GTA game was on a Nintendo system. Prior to GTA III, there was GTA Advance available for the Game Boy, and once again, I doubt attempting to research that arrangement will net me anything interesting, unless I use a time machine or the wayback machine.

Some mechanics in Chinatown Wars that use the touchscreen include filling your own bottles of Molotov cocktails at the gas station; rigging stolen cars by way of screwdriver, hotwire, or PDA hacking (sidenote: this was most likely the last time in the modern era that PDAs would ever be important in any medium); assembling the sniper rifle for certain occasions, like a story mission; and controversially, drug dealing.

Grand Theft Auto belongs to a list of media properties that courts controversy like Casanova rounding third base for the fifth time in a week, and until recently, RockStar Games themselves have been known for their controversial money maker. Seasoned veterans of the series who skipped over this game may be curious why the drug dealing specifically was a sore point for critics to look at when the game was released. Well, another part of what makes the game different from the others was the player’s direct involvement in the drug dealing. For the most part, the protagonist is merely a glorified middleman who moves things from A to B, rarely having a role in the direct purchase or sale of such things save for cutscenes.

Chinatown Wars breaks away from that and allows the player to do so in their free time away from missions and sometimes as a prerequisite to activate a certain mission. Of course, it comes with its own set of risks. Sometimes the dealers — who come from multiple different gangs and factions — meet up in locations where a police camera is. The presence of the camera can help determine whether a deal is about to be busted, but its presence also raises the prices of a certain product. Minimizing the police response by destroying the cameras is also an option, but the price of the drugs bought or sold also takes a hit. This mechanic makes more use of the high risk, high rewards system that GTA is usually known for.

And I’m certain this is needless to say, but no, video game violence doesn’t lead to real life violence. There was one incident in 2003 when Alabama teen Devin Moore went on a rampage inspired by GTA Vice City that left three people dead and put him on death row where he still sits as of writing this, but if that were the metric used to judge games based on their content, then laws around video games in the US would closely resemble what Australia has on the books which was why GTA III was banned their for over twenty years.

This guy knows how it feels.

This is the part where after reviewing a game and listing its gameplay in detail, I’d encourage you to track down a copy and a working console to play it, or find an emulator to use, but unlike Warner Bros. who practically force us nostalgic types to emulate the 3D Mortal Kombat games, RockStar’s been a big fan of anniversary releases with GTA III, Vice City and San Andreas all getting updates every ten years to correspond with the games’ respective release dates, and GTA Chinatown Wars is the same being made available on smartphones as of late. There’s also a PSP version that adds another character, the opportunistic journalist Melanie Mallard as an extra character. To my knowledge, the smartphone versions are upgrades from the original DS version so, I guess it’s a matter of personal preference.

I had both versions available to me at the time and I personally recommend the PSP version for the extra character and extra music stations alone. Admittedly, there’s no voice lines in this games, except for the DS version where the game says a short dialogue line when the DS is closed and then opened, so the cutscenes are a bit like a visual novel or, since we have precedent, the cutscenes featured in 1988’s Ninja Gaiden on the NES.

As I said, gameplay videos exist on YouTube and however you experience the game is all up to you.

FLCL: New Seasons?

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A beloved, obscure anime with a bizarre lack of fanfare

The subtitle might seem a bit misleading, and it is in some manner. Thing is, I found out about this last week, but it seems that Adult Swim released a teaser in March of 2022 advertising two new seasons subtitled Grunge and Shoegaze.

Yeah, I used the same video as I teased in last week’s post. And that’s the point, this was all the evidence I could find of the new seasons. Normally, my posts are long-form, even if I do on-the-fly research (which tends to be most of the time, honestly speaking), but with so little news about the new seasons of FLCL, I couldn’t help but wonder if it did fly under the radar, which is a shame honestly. It premiered on Toonami in 2001 a short time after the original six episodes were made in Japan, and came back in 2018, during the April Fool’s joke as a promotional piece for FLCL: Alternative and Progressive later that year. The most I could find on it were a few articles and some extra videos providing analysis on the ten-second teaser.

That said, FLCL original, Alternative, and Progressive still give me something to work with. So the most I can do is write about what the other three seasons entailed, fan reception, and perhaps I’ll try my best to speculate on what Shoegaze and Grunge are meant to be, though considering the nature of the property, those names may not mean anything.

Starting with the original, FLCL (read as Fooly Cooly) was launched in Spring 2000 and is remarkably short at six episodes. On the surface, it looks like wacky nonsense that not even JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure would touch with a Stand holding a 5-meter barge pole, but fans of the series recommend watching the entire thing multiple times with a notepad nearby for some homework.

Depending on what you’re focusing on — which is its own feat because there’s a lot that goes on in just this show — you may be looking at the main character, Naota Nandaba, learn what it means to be mature while trying to speedrun childhood or you may be looking at the highlighted character, Haruko Haruhara, prepare to face off against organizations known as Medical Mechanica and the Fraternity so she can steal ultimate power from the pirate king Atomsk.

Just kidding!

Now maybe it’s me, but I’ve heard people focus on one or the other without considering that they run concurrent. Most often, I hear people focus on one or the other, likely because Naota has nothing to do with Atomsk or Medical Mechanica… except that the connecting piece between them is Haruko herself, who introduces herself to the scene by speeding on a Vespa and braining the boy with a bass guitar. The impact gives him a ginormous bump that morphs into a horn that acts as a portal for which a robot emerges from his forehead. Even if Naota isn’t directly involved with these intergalactic shenanigans, it doesn’t stop Haruko from pulling him along while some of the other people in his life come along for the ride. Hell, looking at the rest of the townsfolk, Naota might as well be out of place, which is part of the point of FLCL’s meaning as the plot goes along. I’m not saying it’s bad to focus on one aspect over the other, there’s no wrong way to interpret something, even if the conclusions you come across are different from the general consensus, but thinking one is more important than the other is a bit misleading, even if the two don’t connect directly. As an example, William Shakespeare’s play King Lear was said to be performed on Boxing Day in 1606 and a few months later the Kingdom of England successfully set up the Virginia colony after failing the first two times twenty years earlier, yet there’s no connection between them aside from the country because Shakespeare’s contributions to geopolitics and colonialism are nonexistent.

On the whole though, most fans of FLCL original have lots of love for it. The points of divergence are sharp and clear between that of Progressive and Alternative. Progressive is about a girl named Hidomi Hibajiri whose personality is a match with that if Naota, except she’s most defined by her cat-ear headphones and unlike Naota, she chooses to ignore everything. The boy at least interacted with people; this girl would honestly be mistaken as a “relatable character” by some. Off topic, but I hate how relatable has come to equal jaded and gloomy. Is it hard to relate to a smily, joyful character? I haven’t seen it in full, but the clips of Tomo-chan is a Girl that feature Carol Olston specifically are some of my favorite, and we are nothing alike.

Anyway, like Naota, Hidomi was hit by a weird woman in a weird vehicle who goes on to live with her and her mother, Hinae, as the maid and of course Medical Mechanica returns to bear its fangs. But where’s Haruko in this? Well, she’s the teacher and this time she goes by the name Haruha Raharu. Now based on that description, this sounds like a skeleton wearing the skin of FLCL, and to some, it is. It’s not the same FLCL with a hidden meaning about growing up and boyhood; the original meaning is lost without Naota anywhere to be seen. Then again, I say that this is a fallacy from a fallacy, which draws the conclusion that Naota’s story is the only thing worth focusing on while all that other tomfoolery is going on in the background. This is true, but I’m hard-pressed to say that it should be isolated as much as it is. I’m more of the belief that it’s a coming-of-age story with a challenge for the boy to overcome as opposed to two separate things that barely interact with each other.

The widespread attachment to Naota at the cost of the rest of the plot might be an attribution to the general weirdness of anime being taken as normal and so the plot with Haruko and Atomsk and Medical Mechanica and what not isn’t seen as important as a jaded young boy growing up with unreliable relationships, and I understand that argument, but I also don’t like that. Not that I think it’s a bad faith argument to emphasize the boy’s importance, but to me, it’s more that Naota Nandaba’s story, while as important to the meaning of the show, isn’t what I would call the be-all, end-all.

I also don’t think the Haruko-Atomsk plot is meant to be the main focus of the show either. A video by akidearest on YouTube explains that the director, Kazuya Tsurumaki, wanted to break the rules as much as possible when making the show.

For Alternative, it’s got a wider cast and a more sociable protagonist, Kana Koumoto, and her friends, Mossan, Pets, and Hijiri, all of whom are in the latter half of high school and all of whom are also said to lead unremarkable lives until the giant monster jellyfish shows up and incinerates everything… oh, my mistake, that’s SpongeBob. Same as before: Haruko, bass guitar, Atomsk, the whole shebang.

If you’ve been following along, you’ll notice that as we progress, the protagonists get older and older. Naota is 12 years old, Hidomi is 14, and Kana et al are around 17-18. So for the most part, everyone is growing up and whatever we can expect from Grunge and Shoegaze, slated for release later this year might follow this path or do something completely different.

Across all three of them, FLCL at least maintains the relationships theme, whether it highlights how unreliable they can be as we age, learning to soften up to people, or how hard it can be to maintain them over time. Akidearest’s video linked above shows that FLCL’s plot is a complicated mess of many things and my research on the show and this blog reflect how hard it is to understand. It’s not just a distraction, it’s a fractal distraction, or at least that’s the frame that it’s wearing.

Part of the intention of this specific blog was to look at why a lot of fans of OG FLCL don’t give Progressive and Alternative as much of a chance with a lot of them seeing clones that wear the name as a mask while also questioning the necessity of a double-sequel after seventeen or so years in naptime, but for me, this highlights a number of false conclusions about FLCL and the coming-of-age genre. I didn’t get it at the time, but when I read Catcher in the Rye in high school, I just wrote Holden Caulfield off as a spoiled brat. While I still think that, I’ve come to realize that sometimes he has a point and it’s not all about misunderstanding the world from the mind of an adolescent.

All things considered, Progressive and Alternative follow the coming-of-age model quite nicely, even in the piecemeal fashion as presented. Do I think any one of them are better than the other? That’s a loaded question for me as I think there’s an audience for each type of animation style within the confines of any given animation and specifically FLCL, but as far as plot goes, I can’t really find one I prefer to the other. I feel about all of FLCL the same way I feel about JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. Everyone has criticisms for and against some aspect of it, and I’m not above that, but the connecting element for JJBA is the family legacy of the Joestar clan’s fight against Dio and his cronies or just fate itself. I don’t have a part I dislike, but I do have some that I lean more towards than most.

Similarly, there’s a lot to examine about all three seasons of FLCL so far. In isolation or association, they all do their job well enough while following different stages in life. But that doesn’t answer if I think one of them is superior. To that I say–

Cop out answer incoming: declaring preference for one over the other is complicated for me. I tend to do it selectively, and with full expectations that what I like now will be different in the next few years. So not superior to anything else, but circling back to my point about relatable characters being gloomy and dejected, I like FLCL: Alternative because of the extra cast of characters to work with than just what I see in the others as a textbook case of how not to communicate. The others are still good in their own right, though.

April Fools’ Day and Adult Swim

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Pranks and Adult Animation

April 1 is a golden opportunity for a lot of people to play practical jokes on each other, and there’s often no rules as to how this can go. As long as no one gets hurt then have at it. In the case of TV, even the news likes to have their go at the festivities. Personally, I think there’s more mileage in animation which brings me to the topic of this post’s title.

Perhaps by virtue of being an adult animation TV channel, Adult Swim has a knack for partaking in the jokes and merriment of April Fools’ Day. In some cases, where the program runs from late night March 31 to early morning April 1, they’ll engage in some tomfoolery on the shows they plan on airing, messing with the schedule, or other such on-air silliness. As a bonus for them, it’s an opportunity to air shows set to debut sometime in the future.

What interests me the most of all is that this isn’t exclusive to just the Adult Swim block. In the US, Cartoon Network, Adult Swim, and Toonami, all air on the same channel. CN is the primary daytime block; by 9:00 PM every night Adult Swim airs from Sunday to Friday all night, handing the reins back to CN at 5:00 AM; and on Saturday from midnight to 5:00 AM, Toonami airs.

All three have a rotating body of regular shows, some of which have gone down in animation history from Johnny Bravo, Dexter’s Laboratory, Power Puff Girls, and Teen Titans on Cartoon Network; King of the Hill, Futurama, Family Guy, Aqua Teen Hunger Force on Adult Swim; and Toonami’s had a variety of different anime, the most common ones ranging from Cowboy Bebop, to FLCL, to Naruto, Dragon Ball Z, Bleach, and One Piece, some of which are still on the block albeit in the dead of night.

Every April 1, viewers of Adult Swim and sometimes Toonami are in for any given treat. The first round of AS pranks began back in 2004 as a series of slight alterations to the channel’s shows. They were quick to do the same to Toonami and as the years went on, they got progressively more spontaneous. The tradition was still ongoing even after Toonami was canned in 2008. The Wikipedia page for Toonami describes the cancellation of Toonami as low-ratings. But I think I know what the true culprit was for that. Toonami is normally hosted by a robot character known as TOM who introduces the audience to the show and over the years the first time around, he’s gone through more than a few appearance changes through interactive events known as Total Immersion Events.

These events have been a staple of the block for years and generally involve a crisis of some sort attacking TOM’s station where he and AI partner SARA host the programming block. After the crisis is solved or averted or sometimes succeeded into killing TOM, a new appearance is adopted and the appearance of TOM 4 in 2007 was why it was axed the following year.

I wouldn’t say TOM 4’s appearance straight up assassinated the block, but it was a major contributor to the dip in viewership.

For about four years, Toonami was dead until it was revived for April Fools 2012 with a return to form. TOM 3, or in this case 3.5, returned to catch the viewers up to speed that night, by airing some old shows that have been on the block years prior, notably Fullmetal Alchemist and Tenchi Muyo. It wasn’t until a month later that executives confirmed on social media that Toonami was back for good this time.

Ever since, the April Fools’ Day pranks haven’t stopped and occasionally there’s a crossover into Toonami as previously mentioned. One of my personal favorites has to come from 2018. Being a western animation block airing English dubbed anime, the block normally doesn’t air anything in Japanese unless it’s something along the lines of an interview with a mangaka, a director, a studio in Japan or something else. Well, for 2018, not only were Japanese-dubbed anime put on the TV, TOM and SARA themselves were also given Japanese dubs, as was the logo.

Normally, April Fools’ is where AS markets the premiere of an upcoming show or a show’s next season later in the year, and for Toonami, I believe they were especially excited for this as FLCL: Alternative and Progressive were slated to air later that year. Additionally, they put on the 2004 Masaaki Yuasa produced movie Mind Game, also in Japanese, because this April Fools’ wasn’t weird enough.

This still goes down as one of my favorite April Fools’ events from Adult Swim and I was almost expecting them to do it again especially recently. Last month, they stuck it out with the April Fools’ tradition as expected and poking around on the associated subreddit, I kinda got my hopes up a bit. Part of the charm of these events is that its unpredictable. The only thing a viewer can expect from these is a deviation from the schedule and an introduction to a new show or new season of an existing show. This tradition was honored and for 2023, audiences got a taste of new show Royal Crackers and another season was confirmed for The Eric Andre Show and Teenage Euthanasia.

I was expecting something for Toonami this year, but it seemed Adult Swim took the glory. The daily discourse these days has been that of the progress in AI technology, so to capitalize on that, Adult Swim used a generative AI (think DALL-E or Midjourney) to run their programs in the early morning hours of April 1, mildly disrupting the run of Smiling Friends and putting a rerun of Space Ghost: Coast to Coast. It’s hard to explain in wording or writing so have a look at the livestream from that day.

In contrast, Toonami aired the shows as normal whilst paying homage to the joke that put them back on TV. The reason I expected a 2018-style makeover was because Toonami comes on every Saturday night at midnight and April began on a Saturday, but this was more of a miscalculation on my end. Toonami began about three hours earlier than the midnight setup that it has now. Double bills are also quite rare in this regard, so while Adult Swim did give us something stupid to laugh at early Saturday morning, this wasn’t guaranteed for Toonami. Again, April Fools’ Day pranks on AS are unpredictable after all.

So the joke is very much on me, but I still think it was fun this year. Another possible double bill April Fools’ Day prank could probably occur the next time April begins on a Saturday and because 2024 is a Leap Year, the next time that’ll happen coincidentally will be another Leap Year: 2028, which is the year I turn 30. Again, this is speculation. I’m not Nostradamus trying to see what’s in the future…

Significant changes to your life are in the future.

One more thing before I end this blog post, I may have a topic for the next week that’ll throw my schedule into the fray and it concerns FLCL mentioned above. Here’s a sneak peek:

Admittedly, this was from March 2022, but I’m gonna write about it next week because I didn’t know about it at the time.

An Attempt to Fix the Original God of War Timeline

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A week-long journey in rewriting a fictional storyline

Two weeks ago, I made a post in the midst of a memory lapse concerning the God of War timeline. My vague notes were misinterpreted as a detailed look at the timeline, but on reflection, I realized that it may have been more in line with making the timeline make better sense due to the plot holes as well as mythical inaccuracies. In a rough draft, I attempted to do this for the entire chronology of Greek era God of War and unweaving one thread meant unweaving another and, fittingly, this would mean further opening Pandora’s box.

Some of the points I brought up were based on The Mythology Guy’s videos on listing all the mythical inaccuracies in the series, and there are a lot. But then again, Mythology Guy did it all for fun. That’s kind of how it started for me until the script sprouted wings and flew south for the winter.

I still think it’s fun to look at all the inaccuracies in the games and at the end of the day, that’s what they are. It’s generally not that deep despite the lore built up, but I didn’t want to let it all go just like that. I do still think there are things to address in accordance with the series plot. Some of these changes might be radical enough to essentially rewrite one or more of the games, but even if we acknowledge more than a few inaccuracies (like nonexistent weapons and relics for example), there’s still a few things that need some TLC.

The length of my draft opened my eyes to how untenable rewriting six games to be more mythically accurate could get. I’ve always given the games leeway since myths tend to be based on a version of reality while also having multiple tellings and retellings over time, such is the case with Egyptian mythology, but one of the examples I think should be changed regards Kratos’ ability to kill gods. One of the most famous victims of his goals being Hades’ wife, Persephone.

As we can see from this picture above, in-game Persephone has a dark aroma about her. Wearing a dark dress, gloomy demeanor, and spoiler for God of War: Chains of Olympus, plans to use a titan to destroy Olympus in revenge for her kidnapping. Mythical Persephone was the goddess of springtime and her presence on the surface signifies the changing seasons while her absence signifies a coming winter. Changing this aspect of her isn’t a new thing for Santa Monica and it followed them well into the development of the Norse saga.

Just to clarify, I’m not trying to say fat Thor is inaccurate. His personality as a villainous god undyingly loyal to Odin is the inaccuracy. Still makes for an exciting game though.

The portrayal of Persephone as seeking vengeance against Olympus for abandoning her can be chalked up to different versions of the myths. Don’t quote me on this, but I think the version where she willingly wandered into the realm of Hades and grew an affection for the god of the underworld is a relatively recent retelling differing from the myths where she’s a kidnap victim. The kidnap victim angle works hand-in-hand with the double-cross from Olympus and makes for good villain. The point of change that I would say needed a change would be her death. For a while, I ran with the theory that she was a goddess of lesser importance, but commenters in The Mythology Guy’s video on Chains of Olympus stated that the Gauntlet of Zeus was the god-killing weapon specifically.

By this logic, Pandora’s box can grant a mortal the ability to kill god with any weapon since the sword Kratos used on Ares wasn’t all that special, merely acting as a bridge on the outskirts of Athens while the Gauntlet of Zeus bears the name and is the sole property of the king of Olympus, which would apply like the diamond rule where only a diamond can cut another diamond. In this instance, only a tool blessed by an Olympian can kill an Olympian, which also seems to be in line with the Blade of Olympus, from the Titanomachy in the games. So I’ll give the commenters in that video the W for explaining and confirming it, since this is before Kratos gets the powers to kill a god by any other means from the box of Pandora, but another point where Kratos kills a god without gaining the ability from the box or is in possession of a godly weapon comes from God of War: Ascension and the main baddies there: the Furies.

This picture also works to show that despite being a demigod, Kratos was also capable of mutilating a deity with just the blades of Chaos. And you can argue that the blades of Chaos, later Athena, later Exile are all godly weapons capable of killing gods, then Pandora’s Box would be unnecessary later unless the box is capable of making sure the gods, primordials and Olympians alike, but some of this hasn’t been confirmed, so it exists as a retcon.

There’s other stuff that, if changed, or addressed would essentially rewrite the narrative of the games. Personally, I’ve found a newfound appreciation for God of War II for the references and other heroes and characters who appear in the game like Theseus and Perseus, who have an indirect connection through Perseus’ descendant Hercules/Heracles. What I like about Perseus in this game come to the weapons on his person: the reflective shield, the helm of invisibility, the voice acting talents of Harry Hamlin who played the character in 1981’s Clash of the Titans. It’s all so good. To add to this, the point of divergence in his life comes from Kratos taking the head of Medusa instead of him which, in the myths, he was supposed to use on Cetus to save Andromeda from peril, and his quest to see the Sisters of Fate reflects the negative consequences of that in a “Rob Peter to Pay Paul” aspect.

But there’s different things about Perseus to nitpick. Highlighted once again by the Mythology Guy, the sword is the wrong shape and his boots don’t have wings as described in the myths. As for the part of him where he never sought the sisters or died in battle, I’ll leave that part alone. Additionally, before this point, Kratos encounters an elderly Theseus who works as the gatekeeper of the steeds of time, which Kratos himself pointed out was the last thing he expected out of him since Theseus was so famously arrogant and cocky. Something students of Greek mythology are also likely to point out just before the fight on one of the horses.

He’s still quite arrogant in the game, but him having decades on Perseus or even Heracles in God of War III is a strange direction for the developers to take since Perseus is the one who should be an old man instead. In the myths, their indirect connection comes from Perseus being Heracles’ direct ancestor and Heracles encountered Theseus during one of his labors. If we want to alter this slightly, perhaps have a disgruntled and elderly Perseus trade spots with Theseus who’d be obsessed with attempting to regain his fame as the founder-king of Athens.

On the subject of weird directions to take, Hobo Icarus doesn’t make much sense. In the myths, Icarus was warned by his father Daedalus to neither fly too close to the sun or the heat would melt the binding wax that holds the feathers, not too close to the sea or the water would wash away the adhesive. Failing to adhere, the sun melts the wax and sends the boy into the sea to drown and Daedalus buries him on an island.

This would make more sense if it was Daedalus seeking the sisters to see if they could do something about his son as opposed to him becoming a victim of the gods’ cruelty and being forced to work on that labyrinthine Rubik’s cube in God of War III.

In the same game, there’s the issue of the Fates. In Ghost of Sparta, Thanatos tells Kratos and Deimos before fighting them that the Fates determine the paths of everyone in the Greek world, but normally at the behest of the gods, which is also confirmed by Theseus before his own fight in God of War II as well as Lahkesis herself at her own temple before the sisters face their own ultimate fate. A major plot hole here is that the Fates meant for Kratos to beat the odds and get to the temple, but strictly state that there is no changing one’s fate. Whatever happens happens. By this point, Kratos is hellbent on angering his way to Zeus and burying him under the soil of Olympus (or what’s left of it) by the end.

But I have to ask why the Fates would bring him this far if he wasn’t supposed to win. Probably to live up to the prophecy revealed in Ascension and follow the trend of failing to avoid fate by eventually being the cause of it, coupled with Kratos never really losing those god-killing powers from the first game since the Sisters fall to him with more Olympians to follow suit in God of War III. That’s my explanation, but admittedly I’m only working with the powers of extrapolation so I know damn well I’m wrong somewhere.

Not as wrong as Heracles is with his own labors though. He claims in God of War III that he performed all twelve of them, but by my count three of them were taken by Kratos, namely the hydra, the Cerberus, and the Geryon. The first two appeared in GoW 1 as the first battle and the Challenge of Poseidon respectively. The Geryon was the teleporting monster on the island of Crete from Ghost of Sparta, which is fitting since the enemy appears in Heracles’ namesake city in the game. For reference:

Granted in the myth, it didn’t teleport and was described as a three-headed giant or a three-torsoed giant that got bodied by Heracles. I’d still keep the Heracles fight, but maybe change the lines to make the timeline a little bit more consistent than what we got. Going back to Chains of Olympus briefly, Morpheus was pretty much teased as a major figure and him being the god of dreams should have been a golden opportunity for Kratos to combat him in the hopes of getting some kind of relief from his nightmares. Just saying, the series uses the Rule of Three cliché quite a bit so why not give him a third deity to fight unless there were plans that were scrapped? Such a shame we didn’t get to see this.

Speaking of missed opportunities, God of War III has Kratos toppling Olympus in an attempt to reach Zeus. An awesome concept that honestly should have included more deities in the pantheon. We already know about the vacancies left by Ares, Athena, and Persephone, but others either made only one appearance or none at all. Why reference Apollo’s bow but omit the god himself? Or leave Artemis out of the last of the games? Would she have been too OP even for Kratos since she’s a goddess of the hunt? Well, that giant sword she gives him in the first game would suggest that she’s one of the gods you wouldn’t want to trifle with, especially since she turned one of her followers into a bear after an affair with Zeus.

Hades losing his wife to Kratos along with his brother and niece would be a sore spot of reference, and I imagine Zeus would force him to put up with it so he can lend him control of the dead in his fight with Ares, but Hades wouldn’t be the only one pissed off about that. Persephone’s mother should’ve also been there to stop Kratos. Lastly, there are Dionysus and Hestia. Admittedly, some of these omitted gods wouldn’t have any battle prowess, but with the chaos unleashed from the box of Pandora, I’d still think they’d put up a fight of some kind. Dionysus could’ve afflicted Kratos with drunkenness, Hestia and Demeter are both said to wield scepters, and Artemis and Apollo both have bows. Or if this would extend an already pretty long game, how about challenges bearing their names like the first game? Just a thought.

This is just what I think could be used to fix some of God of War’s plot holes, I don’t think they’re egregious and make the games unplayable or unenjoyable, and I understand that some concepts don’t always make it to the final product, like Atlantis getting scrapped and becoming a major plot point for Ghost of Sparta, but some of these points, when examined, don’t often make a lot of sense.

Before I move onto the YouTube channel recommendations, I want to briefly address one recommendation I made in the past. Two weeks ago, I recommended the YouTube channel iilluminaughtii because of her in-depth anticorporatist, anti-MLM documentaries, but earlier this week, it was revealed that former editors and collaborators on her channel and associated channels have dug out some skeletons from her closet.

She attempted to defame another YouTuber when one of his editors questioned the techniques of her editing team on Discord. This specific editor is a YouTuber himself and had simply asked for tips and tricks, which comes with the territory on YouTube, but when the same editing tricks made their way into a video, iilluminaughtii, or in this case Blair herself, got mad and falsely claimed plagiarism on Twitter, which others were quick to point out the hypocrisy as her channel has plagiarized other documentaries in the past.

Now there’s nothing wrong with calling someone out if you believe they stole material or even with referencing a documentary for use in a video or article you yourself are making. The points of divergence come with what Blair claimed and the YouTuber she attempted to accuse of theft. What she claimed was a practice that is common all over the site and the YouTuber she attempted to defame was Devin Stone, a real-life attorney operating in the Washington, DC area whose content focuses on real-life and fictional law cases from the trial in SpongeBob SquarePants to Better Call Saul.

Furthermore, ex-editors and such have come out on Twitter to describe Blair as a person and as a YouTuber personally and none of them have nice things to say about her. For a start, she doesn’t seem to keep a tidy dwelling and is quite accusatory as seen with the nontroversy she tried to start with an actual attorney. She’s also not a good neighbor and doesn’t always practice what she preaches, shaming and lambasting the uber-wealthy, but now that she’d found success from her own channel, she allegedly shopped for luxurious items like expensive clothing brands and cars, sometimes after publishing a video on why X brand doesn’t live up to its purported reputation.

Looking back, it was quite alarming that she could pump out so many documentaries in such a short amount of time considering documentaries take far longer to make than any given movie thanks to the research that goes into them. After what I’d heard about another documentary YouTuber, Jake Tran, I thought I’d be over hypocritical content creators becoming the monsters they sought to destroy, and I make this comparison because this was what I’d thought of with the Twitter threads and YouTube videos released this week that talk about this sort of thing amongst other YouTuber controversies as of late. But whereas Jake Tran took histories lessons as a handbook instead of a warning, Blair is doing the exact thing she often accuses real-life public figures of doing, so what gives?

I’ll still make recommendations for YouTube channels I like and I might cover the topic more in-depth in the future but I can’t make promises to the latter. I don’t really like delving into content creator drama. Personally, I stick around for the content. Online and in Hollywood there are too many examples of celebrities falling victim of their own hubris and I’ll always praise those who try their best to remain controversy-free and point people in their direction since they tend to have evidence of their services to the unfortunate, either through donations or fundraisers, but I can’t say everyone I recommend will be or remain a good person five, ten, twenty years for now. I only promise to try.

As for channels I recommend, to make up for the shortfall that came with Blair “iilluminaughtii,” I have two recommendations this time around. Yes, a two-fer! The first one is Monsieur Z.

https://www.youtube.com/@MonsieurDean/about

Monsieur Z, also known as Mr. Z, real name Dean, is also a history YouTuber who delves into alternate history most of the time. His channel is a bit more frequent than that of Cody Franklin’s Alternate History Hub et al and incidentally, both have been confused with each other because of their deep voices. Politically, Mr. Z leans conservative and has some videos that tacitly or overtly criticize left-leaning and liberal viewpoints, but he’s not a primary current events channel. Most of the time, it’s looking at different points in history that could’ve gone differently like the aforementioned Alternate History Hub.

To throw a bone to Devin Stone, I’m also recommending his channel: LegalEagle.

https://www.youtube.com/@LegalEagle/about

Devin Stone of LegalEagle fame is, as I stated above a real-life attorney who often examines real ongoing law cases as well as fictionalized lawsuits in media. He’s also active on the website Nebula with other similar YouTubers, and even has courses and guides for aspiring lawyers in the US. Whether you hope to become an attorney in the US, you want to know more about the legalese we laymen aren’t always privy to, or if you just want to see how fictionalized court cases compare to real-world practices common in a court room, check out the channel. For both Mr. Z and LegalEagle, they have dedicated Patreon pages and other such outlets for which to support the work that they do, found in their respective about pages.

Also, Devin was a good sport in spite of the dubious claims made against him by Blair. If you’d like, you can look around on YouTube to hear what others have been saying. To summarize, it’s not a very good look for Blair.

What Happened to the Naruto: Ultimate Ninja series?

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The series that had to be soft rebooted

Before we start, I just want to say that I think I meant for last week’s post to be about rewriting the God of War Greek Era narrative in a more cohesive manner considering all the silliness that unearths its plot holes. I’ve defended some overarching stuff since most ancient myths have multiple retellings due to oral tradition, but some specific details are hard to ignore. So, I’ll save that for a future post. This time, we’re gonna talk about the Naruto franchise, more importantly a series of video games based on the franchise that sort of went through a soft reboot about halfway through.

Masashi Kishimoto’s magnum opus, the Naruto franchise, had grown to be a smash hit since its first chapter debuted in 1999. Manga/anime fans hold it in high regard, and it’s part of that generation’s Big Three with the others being Bleach by Tite Kubo and One Piece by Eiichiro Oda. Both of which have gotten their own video games, accessories, figures and more.

With Naruto, part of me wants to say the ninja/shinobi aesthetic was what helped it explode when it began to make waves in the west, so much so that when the anime began dubbing it in English in 2005, the Japanese video games were getting the same treatment soon after. Generally, anime adaptations in Japan are promotional material for the manga, as are the manga’s associated figures, light novels, and other materials. Hence why some of us in the west are still waiting on a second seasons to anime that may never come.

The benefit of releasing in an era where shinobi were the coolest thing since an arctic winter might have heavily tipped the scales in Naruto’s favor, thus explaining the numerous video games associated with it. Specifically, the Ultimate Ninja series. Five main games following the timeline of the manga were released in Japan from October 2003 to December 2007, and ported to the west from June 2006 to November 2009. Likely due to the release of the anime and its western dub, the games loosely follow the events of the manga until they cut off and each successive game adds to the cast of characters to play as.

Ultimate Ninja 1, for instance, starts off with a small cast because it follows the story from the Land of Waves arc until the Destruction of the Leaf/Konoha Crush arc. Many of the important characters are assisting characters during fights, and mostly follow them individually as opposed to staying consistent with the manga, such as the changing around of one or more outcomes of certain battles. The Naruto wiki claims that as far as a presentation goes, critics felt that it left a lot to be desired. Personally, I was introduced to the series through a friend who had the second installment on his PS2 and later I went to buy the first game. From what I’d seen, I agreed with those critics’ statements that more could’ve been done at the outset, and the players and critics got that wish in Ultimate Ninja 2.

In 2004 in Japan and 2007 in the west, the second installment followed up on what the first game brought to the table. Continuing with the rest of the Konoha Crush arc and ending narratively with the Search for Tsunade arc. What became a bit of a trend for the series starting with this game was a game-exclusive arc that can be compared to filler or something along the lines of an OVA. Spoilers to follow: get ready.

After Tsunade is returned to the village to serve as the Fifth Hokage, Orochimaru who didn’t learn his lesson the first time he tried this malarkey has another go at swaying Tsunade’s decision. This time he as an ace in the hole. He and Kabuto were intercepted at the Training Grounds by Kakashi. At this time, Orochimaru’s arms have been sealed and so he needs Kabuto to use his chakra and perform ninjutsu. One such jutsu, is known as the Forbidden Jutsu: Gedo Mark and its main purpose is to limit its opponents.

There’s better pictures for this, I’m sure. Actually, I think it’s better to see it in action.

Sidenote, the YouTube channel in question has a full playthrough of this game among others. I recommend giving it a look.

This next arc sees Orochimaru and Kabuto to try multiple avenues at once to coerce Tsunade into reconsidering releasing Orochimaru’s arms. First, he cripples the more troublesome ninja, namely Kakashi and Naruto, then he uses Reanimation to revive Zabuza Momochi, Haku, and the Third Hokage. After the Leaf ninja find a way to release the Gedo Mark, they soundly defeat Orochimaru and Kabuto and the game ends. Seems even your video games aren’t free from filler. For my take, it’s an interesting story with a lot of stuff that doesn’t make sense. I don’t doubt that Orochimaru’s hunt for the greatest Jutsu ever would lead him to unethical methods, we see this all the way until Boruto confirms that he’s been under lifelong house arrest, but even if he could inhabit another body, the risk to his health in his current state would have even him rethinking his decisions to use ninjutsu willy-nilly like that. Kabuto even says as much. Still enjoyable, and as an added bonus: Taijutsu Naruto.

The Japanese release had characters from the Ninja Clash in the Land of Snow movie.

There’s also a free-roaming mode where players explore the world of Naruto, though considering it stops at the Tsunade Search arc in canon, only a few locations are available. Nonetheless, there’s different activities that can be done with other characters or solo and some of my best memories of the game come from playing with friends at their houses, even if my skills were subpar. Now that the developers were seeing gold, they expanded on this even further in Ultimate Ninja 3.

Released around Christmas 2005 in Japan and in March of 2008 in the west, Ultimate Ninja 3 covers the entirety of Part I from the Land of Waves to the Sasuke Retrieval Mission albeit with some notable omissions, chief among them the Chunin Exam Preliminary Rounds. There might not have been a way get those into the game since the main focus is fighting, but it’s a not insignificant difference that could potentially shape the way someone views the anime if this was their first exposure to the series.

Still, there’s more characters to use, more minigames with the characters, and just like its predecessor there’s an exclusive arc that interestingly got its own OVA for promotional purposes.

Titled “Finally a Clash! Jonin vs. Genin,” the main gist of the OVA is that the Leaf Village in association with the Sand Village puts together a tournament based on a points system. Genin and lower start with one blue crystal worth one point while Chunin and up start with one red crystal worth five points each. Passing a threshold of points advances the ninja to the next round, and passing that threshold allows the victor to pass a regulation that the two villages would follow for a week straight.

It’s initially suggested that battling was the only way to earn crystals but these being physical points you can hold in your hand, you’re not necessarily limited to that kind of all-out battle. Select characters trade them as currency for favors or use them in wagers. There’s also simply looking for the crystals on the ground as they fall out of people’s pockets like change. As for the free-roaming open world element, there’s now jumping and double jumping and the exploration isn’t limited to a few locales, but it’s not the same open world that you’d see in the later Ultimate Ninja Storm series.

This one does a lot more, though I think the limitations of the hardware still did a number on this game since it compresses large arcs into a few battles. I’m not saying I want all the battles and dialogue to be redone in the game, just that a few of the important, plot battles be given theirs. Additionally, it was quite clever of them to hide the Fourth Hokage’s name as simply his nickname in the manga: Yellow Flash, but I’m not sure why he has no speaking role in the game. Something I forgot to mention when talking about Ultimate Ninja 2, that game had a notoriously difficult substitution/rebound system that made it near impossible to properly counter attacks. UN3 and up dumbed that down significantly and I praise the change.

Japanese release: April 2007, and Western release: March 2009, UN4 as seen on the cover starts in the Shippuden era and like its predecessors it has an exclusive arc that is separate from the canon manga arcs and its own open-world RPG-type game mode. This time around, Naruto is still training with Jiraiya. To conclude this round of training, he’s given prayer beads to wrap around each limb and Jiraiya uses a weighting Jutsu to alter the weight of the beads. They change color with experience and when Naruto’s beads glow red, he’s instructed to find Jiraiya who’ll take them off to conclude his training.

In the meantime, the two head to the Tree Felling Village where a girl, Aoi, is to be used as human sacrifice to satisfy a demon known as Black Shadow who lives in the caves. Naruto’s disgust with the practice results in him chasing after the girl who’s determined to go deeper into the cave. Black Shadow physically stops the shinobi, though by now his beads turn red and he’s eager to get them off so he can come back and break down the barrier Black Shadow had summoned earlier.

Before that though, he and Jiraiya gather some information on Aoi and her path as a sacrifice. As it turns out, Aoi was using a desperate though dangerous method to help her ailing mother, Tsubaki, who’s introduced at around the same time Naruto and Jiraiya make it to the Tree Felling Village. The village’s namesake is derived from a tree that blossomed flowers with healing properties. As a bonus, these flowers were a barrier keeping Black Shadow at bay, but when it was chopped down by the villagers and subsequently consumed by Black Shadow all hell broke loose. The villagers then offered an annual sacrifice to the demon to keep him satisfied.

As for Tsubaki’s and Aoi’s lineage, their ancestors were closely linked to the tree and their connects to the tree are limited to a charm with the flower petals inside it since the tree was felled. Aoi’s father died of illness and Tsubaki was on the same path; this culminated in her decision to feign sacrifice as a means of getting close to the tree within Black Shadow and using it as some sort of cure.

After the demon reveals its true form, Naruto fights it, aided by Aoi, and soundly defeats Black Shadow. Unfortunately, the leaves from the tree have long since wilted, save for one that Aoi picks up and I presume is used in tea. Then Naruto falls into a weeklong coma and at awaking, he finds that Tsubaki made a full recovery and Naruto and Jiraiya return to the Leaf Village having made a difference in this family’s life.

Afterwards, the game starts in the Kazekage Rescue arc, but ends halfway through before the Kazekage proper has been saved. I don’t have evidence to support this, but I think the game released as Shippuden was beginning. The only evidence I see is the release date being consistent with the beginning of Shippuden’s anime adaptation.

It’s pretty much the same as the other games, but with more characters, more movement, etc. But even though, the Shippuden arc leaves a lot to be desired, fortunately in the open-world game mode, there are coins known as Pieces of Memory where you can view the story of all of Part I from the Land of Waves arc to the Sasuke Retrieval Mission, so it’s not a total loss.

Naturally, you could assume that a fifth game was on the horizon to restart the first arc of Shippuden and keep it going to at least the end of the Tenchi Bridge Arc where we see Shippuden Sasuke. This was what I thought too at the time and I found out as recently as a few years ago that there was a fifth game that never made it to North America.

In the UN series by itself this is the last of the main Ultimate Ninja games until Ultimate Ninja Storm on the next generation of consoles. Do note that I’m not saying it has no English language release. When the UK was still an EU country, it was eligible for most EU ports of certain games, this being one of them, so while I managed to find an emulated version of the EU release, this game doesn’t exist outside of Japan or Europe and I don’t think my preschool level Japanese is gonna help me if I play with Japanese subtitles and audio.

This game actually is what motivated this post. Four games bear the Ultimate Ninja tag all released on the PS2 and the fifth one was never made for fans from the Americas. What’s the reason for this? My closest source again comes from the Naruto wiki and it can be boiled down to time constraints and dubbing issues. I can’t say with certainty as I have no evidence that this is the case, but I’m at least somewhat positive that the release dates and the evidence in the games is enough of a clue to work with.

Almost all of them released concurrent with the anime adaptation, but several years after the manga was a few arcs ahead of what was depicted, which explains why UN4’s main story is so short compared to the others. Episode 15 was the most recent episode when that game came out. As for time constraints, with the other games coming out as fast as they did, of course time was Namco’s enemy here. I only made it to the title screen as I wanted to finish the UN games before making it to five, but from what I saw even the EU release was botched with only Japanese audio with the selected nation’s language for subtitles.

From what I can gather, they were going to keep up with this trend of releasing the games around the same week as a new arc, but it seems fate forced the devs to rethink things a bit. I could see a UN6 continuing from the emergence of the Akatsuki’s Zombie Combo up until Sasuke’s formation of Team Hebi (later Taka) to finally exact revenge on Itachi for the Uchiha Clan Downfall all those years ago. And follow that trend until the manga concluded with some extra ideas for other exclusive/filler arcs.

Realistically, the problems with keeping this up grew to be untenable. At the same time some of these games were being made, the similar graphics were being used for most of the spin-off and mobile/handheld titles like the Ultimate Ninja Heroes series on the PSP and Ultimate Ninja Impact. It’s not like the Japan-only games that weren’t meant for the west; bad luck essentially forced them to hit the reset button and try again with a better series.

Better graphics, new engine, more characters, more to do with the environment and make it feel as though the player is playing the anime, the UN Storm series is in all aspects a technical upgrade. However, there’s a bunch of from the previous series that several gamers may be disappointed to learn were done away with. It took some getting used to to learn that UN3 onwards discarded the multiple screens for an ultimate jutsu as well as different ultimate jutsu in gameplay, and the RPG-esque text reading at least felt like it was advancing faster because the characters would always voice the lines so you did more than read and listen to the background music.

My exposure only comes in the last game Ultimate Ninja 4 which wraps the story up admittedly more beautifully than the anime. At least they did something with the Boruto movie adaptation. And since this was the last of Naruto’s story, if this game was using the Boruto plot to promote the movie then cool!

Though now that I think about it, it’s possible that the reputation of Naruto was what made loads of people expect better from the Boruto series. As much as I’ve been cheerleading Boruto, I also wish it would improve in some areas, though it looks like I’ll get my wish when both the manga and anime return later this year, along with a new game set for release soon.

For this week, I recommend the YouTube channel Alternate History Hub.

https://www.youtube.com/@AlternateHistoryHub/about

This channel specializes mostly in what’s on the tin: alternate history. What if the US stayed out of both world wars? What if Spain stayed Muslim? What if Japan went Catholic? What if the Ottomans colonized the Americas? and other such topics that explore what would happen if history took a different path than what happened in our timeline.

Just like my Trash Taste recommendation from a few months ago, there’s other associated channels with Alternate History Hub. Cody Franklin oversees this channel, he used to oversee the channel Knowledge Hub which is now Knowledge Husk until he gave it to his brother Tyler, and recently, Cody launched the channel Pointless Hub which looks more at entertainment media than something along the lines of geopolitics. You can even support him and his channels through the associated Patreon links.

If alternate history seems right up your alley, give him a follow. If not, then there’s other stuff of his to view.

God of War Original: On Kratos

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Norse God of War looks impressive, but…

Going back to notes on future topics, I hadn’t really planned all that well for future topics. This week just says God of War original, but I didn’t really elaborate any further on what I meant by that; I was just listing things off for what I’d like to cover well into September of this year, though for reasons to be revealed much later as more details come to me, I doubt I’ll be anywhere near a device long enough to make regular weekly Friday blog posts.

For this week, I don’t remember whether I wanted to talk about what makes even Greek Kratos a good character along with Norse Kratos or if I wanted to cover a timeline of the Greek era games. I’ve seen more videos contextualizing and/or defending Greek Kratos to rebut the game journalists who were ready to discard him with very little knowledge of the rest of the series, and I’ve done this before as well. My first blog post defends Kratos while still acknowledge that his behavior and actions are downright brutal, so instead of repeating that, I think I’ll put together a comprehensive timeline.

Note: this will mostly before the Greek era and may only cover the games I’ve played, so although the developers claim God of War: Betrayal is canon, I currently don’t have a means to play this. I did find and save a comment on r/GodofWar that tells people how to play on a modern smartphone since it was developed for cell phones when they looked like this:

So I don’t think I can add it to the timeline I’ll create since I haven’t played it yet. Also, most people haven’t really played it either due to how much of a hassle mobile games were in the mid-2000s, so whether its omission changes anything or not depends. To my knowledge, it doesn’t all come to a head until God of War III, but let’s not jump the gun and follow Kratos on his journey.

The extras in the first God of War game set the stage for Kratos the character who coincidentally shares the same name of the mythological god of power and strength and one of Zeus’ best agents/servants.

Kratos’ Origins:

As I recall, the extras in the first game explain his origin story. A mortal woman with a child of dubious paternity in tow was cast out of her city-state and chose to make a home in Sparta and raise her son accordingly. Later, the same mortal woman mothers a second child but cannot establish his father either. The boys live the typical life of a burgeoning Spartan warrior in preparation for the lifelong training to be undergone by young boys around the age of 7.

Tragedy strikes the younger of the brothers. Born with a distinctive birthmark, the gods of Olympus are warned that a marked warrior will bring doom to Olympus, and set out to virtually erase this boy’s existence. Two gods, a brother and sister, take the younger brother and wound the elder. Normally, Greek gods seldom leave survivors so the older brother and their mother had to live with the fact that the younger brother had perished.

This failure to save the younger brother motivated the older brother to become a fully devoted Spartan warrior. Native son or not, this was his home and he was determined to fight in his memory, even gaining a distinctive tattoo to honor his brother’s memory.

Later in life, the older brother known as Kratos married the most beautiful woman in Sparta: Lysandra and fathered a girl named Calliope. In Ancient Sparta, the health of the infant determined their lot. Sickly children were often discarded and Calliope born sickly would surely have been abandoned pertaining to Spartan law.

Kratos made a promise that he wouldn’t be weak and fulfilling that promise, after hearing about the Ambrosia of Asclepius, god of medicine and healing, he sets out to find it to save his daughter. The problem here is that he’s not the only champion who sets out on this quest. Other champions, personally gambled on like race horses by the gods of Olympus, are also on the hunt for the ambrosia. Kratos eventually wins this wager without knowing he was being bet on and sees Calliope well into her own childhood.

After this, he set out on campaigns to expand and strengthen Sparta’s brutal reputation, but his relationship with his family suffers as a result. One such battle eliminates a large number of Spartans and almost spells the end for Kratos until he pleads to the god of war, Ares to save him from death. His offer was his life. Following on this, Ares gifts Kratos a brand new set of weapons to carry into battle. Their chains were seared onto his arms to remind him of his oath to the god of war, never to be removed.

These blades took the head of their first victim soon after, and would set a course for Kratos’ downfall. His time as a devotee to the god who saved him drove him to extremes, you’d grow to be scared of the monster he was becoming. Across the Greek world, Kratos’ name would be made infamous with one single act.

The final straw that broke the camel’s back came when he set his fellow devotees on a rampage against followers of Ares’ sister, Athena, the god of wisdom. The village was massacred behind Kratos as he set his sights on the temple in the middle of the village.

The associated oracle warns him not to go inside, but the prophecy falls on deaf ears as he slaughters the lot of these civilians, the final two pulled him to his senses. Through trickery and manipulation, Kratos slaughtered his family.

Soon after Kratos understands the horror at his feet, an image of his patron god appears to praise him on his lack of mercy and make him into a warrior with nothing to lose. Ares misunderstood though that Kratos’ family was what kept him going for so long. Now that he’s widowed and fatherless, he can’t bring himself to continue to worship Ares.

As punishment for spilling familial blood, the oracle fastens the ashes of his family to his skin, a sign to all of what he was, thus birthing the Ghost of Sparta, a derisive moniker to remind him of his crimes. Worse yet for Kratos, the Furies, keepers of oaths and goddesses of vengeance punish him for breaking away from the god of war.

Ascension:

Breaking away from any deity is a punishable offense. As an example, the Hecatonchires, Aegaeon, was punished by having his many heads and limbs turned into a living prison, or more accurately a zombie prison since Aegaeon’s corpse was used extensively as the prison and he doesn’t get to move until activated by the cruel Furies.

Megaera, Tisiphone, and Alecto all vow to bring Kratos back to Ares or kill him whichever one comes first. Along his journey, their son, Orkos, guides him on his path to free him from the crippling visions that have since followed him. Part of this journey involves seeking out the Oracle of Delphi, Aletheia. Guarded by slave workers and their owner Castor and Pollux (reimagined as conjoined twins), Kratos climbs up the the temple to seek an audience with the Oracle, though without tribute as would be expected. Castor attempted to turn him away for forgoing this rule, but learned first hand why he was the Ghost of Sparta.

The fight carries a third casualty; armed with the Amulet of Ouraborus, Castor destroys the temple and mortally wounds Aletheia, but fortunately for Kratos, she survives long enough to further assist him. His next move is to travel to the island of Delos, home of the statue of Apollo currently in disrepair to gain the eyes of the oracle.

At the same time, the Furies give chase and almost have him prisoner until Orkos intervenes and gives him the stone he uses to be in multiple places at once. At the same time, Kratos rebuilds the statue with the amulet and eventually gains the eyes of the oracle, but doesn’t hold onto them for long. The other mystical relics on this journey of his are confiscated while he gets chained to the Hecatonchires prison. He later regains them and fights off the Furies as they fail to entice or coerce him into serving Ares once more.

To this end, the last method used is the image of his family. But Kratos chooses reality and kills the Furies, seemingly freeing him of his oath until Orkos reveals that as a last ditch effort, Orkos was made the oathkeeper and Kratos can’t be free of his hallucinations until he kills Orkos, which he does reluctantly.

Chains of Olympus:

The journey of redemption is a long one. Kratos stopped serving Ares after it cost him his family, but still seeks to forget his past while under the service of the rest of Olympus. As such, he serves as the main guide for the Attica military in the midst of a Persian invasion with a basilisk in tow. Kratos fights off the Persian Army, their king and destroys the fire breathing beast, thus saving Attica, but Kratos, halfway through his decade of servitude for penance demands another challenge.

On cue, the sun falls out of the sky as a black fog engulfs the lands. At Helios’ temple, a statue of Athena reveals that Helios was kidnapped and without his command of the sun, Morpheus, god of dreams has taken over the lands.

Morpheus doesn’t physically appear in Chains of Olympus, just his name is used. Kratos finds Helios’ sister, Eos, goddess of dawn, who tells him that Atlas the titan kidnapped Helios. She doesn’t know where they went and can’t help any further weakened by the absence of Helios. However, he can still find him by activating the steeds that pull the chariot everyday.

We’re all adults here, but the images of Eos in game have her with her breasts uncovered and I don’t want to risk myself or anyone else reading getting flagged. I could definitely censor the bare nipples, but I chose the easier method of showing her back since I wanna finish this in time for lunch.

Anyway, Kratos activates the steeds and they take him to Hades where Helios was taken by Atlas. On his way, he demands the ferryman Charon bring him to where Helios is being kept. Charon refuses as the gods still needs him and soundly defeats him in battle and sends him to Tartarus.

Kratos breaks out and acquires the gauntlet of Zeus. Climbing out with this new weapon, Kratos returns to the docks to defeat the ferryman and take his ship further into Hades. An apparition haunting him since he was at Helios’ temple was that of Calliope, whom Kratos gifted a carved flute for her to play in reference to her namesake being one of the nine muses.

This apparition of his daughter takes him off his course to save humanity and he willingly sacrifices his powers to be with her in Elysium since there’s no other way for him to get into Elysium elsewise, at the instruction of Persephone.

The reunion is short-lived as the goddess of spring and wife of Hades reveals that she was the one who freed Atlas and used him to kidnap Helios. The next phase of her plan was to use him to destroy the pillar that holds up the world. Instead, Kratos traps the titan beneath the world and uses the gauntlet of Zeus to kill Persephone. The sacrifice he made though was his own daughter. If the pillar was destroyed then Kratos would lose her and her memory, but if it was spared and the world saved, he would have to abandon her. Nonetheless, he fulfills his promise and begrudgingly accepts his place as the servant of the gods.

2005:

Five years after the events of Chains of Olympus, Kratos onboard a ship combats the hydra and sets a course for Athens. Athena calls upon Kratos to save her city from her brother. This doubles as a chance at redemption and a means for Kratos get his revenge on Ares. Before he had to live with his crimes as nightmares, but with a chance to defeat Ares in sight, he jumped at the opportunity hoping it would mean his nightmares would finally end.

Chaos is ensuing at just the gates to Athens proper, and Kratos goes to the oracle of Athens to consult a guide on defeating Ares. He saves her from the minions of Ares and tells him that the power to slay even a god rests within the box of Pandora.

Still a risky picture, but there’s significantly less breast exposure. The oracle tells Kratos that the path to the box is through the desert and Athena, through her statues, elaborates that it’s hidden at the highest level of the temple which is in turn chained to the back of Chronos, who is forced to forever traverse the desert.

Along the way, Kratos comes across deadly traps and perilous enemies, while also being aided by the gods. Finally he reaches the box itself, but is then killed by Ares and has the box taken from him. He still has this task to complete and fights his way out of Hades to complete it with aid of a grave digger that he ran across earlier in the game.

I’ve seen the above photo several times, and only now has it dawned on me that the bottom half is like that meme of the elegantly drawn horse but half-finished. Back at the Temple of the Oracle, Kratos treks through the building to reach Ares, now proclaiming his possession of the box, and threatening to use it on Olympus.

Kratos hurls a Zeus lightning bolt at the chain holding the box, opens it, and uses its power to kill Ares. A mortal man defeated a god for the first time in history, and Athens can rebuild anew, but Kratos learned that he was only set up for redemption and forgiveness. He’s stuck with those nightmares for life. Taking this as a betrayal, he sought to end his own life, but the gods had other plans. Because of his service to Olympus, he’s given the seat of the God of War as consolation. But this wasn’t enough for Kratos.

Ghost of Sparta:

Now that he has the throne of Ares, a long repressed memory of his brother Deimos resurfaces. This time, though, he seeks an answer as to the true fate of his brother. Organizing a fleet of sailors, he sets a course for Atlantis where his mother, Callisto, rests in a chamber, ailing and waiting for her son’s arrival. Knowing his intentions, the gods attempt to dissuade Kratos by unleashing beasts like Scylla, but it doesn’t work out as they hoped.

Through whooping coughs, she reveals that she was forced to lie to Kratos about the fate of his brother at the behest of his father, whose identity she was also cursed to keep secret. Failure to do so transforms her into a beast that Kratos kills. In her dying breath, Callisto urges Kratos travel to Sparta and find a key to the Gate of Death, the realm of the primordial Greek god Thanatos.

After this battle, he travels through the Methana Volcano and acquires the bane of Thera which imbues his blades with fire. In doing so, the stability of the volcano’s interior is in jeopardy as Kratos also uses the fire to destroy the gears that operate the Archimedes screws that regulate the temperature of the volcano. Without all of these, the volcano begins to erupt and Atlantis sinks to the seabed.

The resulting eruption sends Kratos flying into the city of Heraklion, where the Grave Digger greets him, this time with a warning that the destruction of Atlantis will cost him whatever favor he gained from his prior service to Olympus, especially Zeus. Unfortunately for Olympus, occupying the god of war’s throne wasn’t what he desired, and so he sets forth to continue on his trek to Deimos.

Part of this path takes him through the Aronia Mountains where young Spartans are sent to conquer their fears. Going back to the god of death foreshadowing, he and his daughter Erinys are tasked with preventing Kratos from reaching his goal.

During the battle, Kratos conveniently returns to Sparta and his treated as a legend among his countrymen. While there, he comes across a dissenter in the jails who nearly gets him killed. Despite the results of his battle, there’s a small minority of devotees to Ares. Nevertheless, Kratos makes it out of the jails of Sparta and travels to the temple of the fallen god of war to retrieve the key: the skull of Keres.

With the skull in hand, he sets a course back to the now submerged Atlantis to activate the Gate of Death with the key. The realm of death (which I interpreted as Purgatory) is described as a place where neither god nor mortal dares enter willingly.

Navigating the realm, Kratos finally finds his brother, but the reunion is a bloody affair. The associated trophy suggests that Kratos held back because he just wanted his brother back even if it meant he died with hatred in his heart. Not long afterward, Thanatos took Deimos away again and when Kratos returns to save his brother from death again, the two engaged in battle with Thanatos, who admitted the short-sightedness of Olympus’ decision to take Deimos and not Kratos. Though it wouldn’t have made a difference which brother was abducted.

Deimos dies in the fight and after Kratos kills Thanatos, he lays his brother to rest for real this time. Now that it’s only him left, Athena arrives to bestow godhood to Kratos as he now lacks a familial bond on earth. Kratos doesn’t take very kindly to being forced to massacre his family piecemeal and promises to topple Olympus for it one way or another.

II:

Now a god, Kratos relished in the comfort of battle and war in defiance of the peace that Olympus desired in the world. Athena implores him to stop, but he refuses and continues to aid in an ongoing invasion of Rhodes. His brutality turned out to be worse than what Ares was capable of, so Zeus strips him of a fraction of his godhood while bringing the Colossus of Helios at Rhodes to life to fight Kratos and defend the city.

Kratos battles the statue, but Zeus feigns aid by lending him the Blade of Olympus. He’s tricked into pouring the last of his powers into the blade and uses it to destroy the statue soundly, but falling debris causes him to drop the blade and his mortality returns to him. He tried to save face and retrieve the blade, but Zeus beat him to the punch. He expressed his disappointment at what’s become of the Ghost of Sparta.

When Kratos refuses this last opportunity to stand by Zeus, Zeus killed him and annihilated the combating armies of Sparta and Rhodes, save for one lone Spartan. Kratos was then resurrected and encouraged by Gaia to return to the world of the living. He greeted the last Spartan and issued orders to return and fortify Sparta’s defenses while he prepared to face Zeus again, commandeering a Pegasus who doesn’t take him straight to his destination of choice.

A pair of titans has keys he needs to even stand a chance against the king of Olympus. Typhon’s Bane to be retrieved from its namesake’s eye, and the Rage of the Titans to be retrieved from sacrificing Prometheus to the fires of Olympus. With both, Kratos frees the Pegasus previously trapped beneath Typhon’s hand and travels with his new weapons to the Isle of Creation.

This island is the home of the Sisters of Fate, where travelers can request an audience with the sisters. As it turns out, others had similar ideas. The island is filled with numerous traps and guarded by the Steeds of Time which were meant as a gift from Chronos in a feeble attempt to change his own fate from what Zeus had done to him after the Titanomachy.

The steeds are guarded by the last person you’d expect to serve anyone before himself: Theseus.

The old man challenges Kratos to battle and gets trounced by the Ghost of Sparta who then uses his key to traverse the rest of the island and acquires some of Chronos’ lightning magic. Here, he encounters the first of his old enemies in search of a do-over from the sisters: the Barbarian King who fought on the Persian side all those years ago.

Long dead, he returns as a zombie in possession of an undead horse and the hammer that almost killed Kratos when he pleaded for a second chance. The barbarian dies a second time, and Kratos takes his hammer as a secondary weapon. He then encounters Jason and his Argonauts stranded around the island and in varying degrees of screwed. Jason himself in possession of the golden fleece when he gets eaten by a Cerberus beast.

Kratos retrieves the relic and now has the ability to throw attacks back and parry limitlessly. This acquisition of extra relics takes him through Euryale’s temple where he battles her and takes her head as he did her sister years ago in Athens.

The second person seeking counsel with the sisters is Perseus who failed in his myth to save Andromeda without Medusa’s head. Kratos kills him and stumbles upon hobo Icarus who attempts to reserve the right to seek the sisters of fate.

In their fight, Kratos takes his wings and navigates the body of Atlas. Before breaking out from the chasm, Kratos is discovered by the titan who is convinced to stop exacting revenge on the Spartan after hearing of his plan to use the Blade of Olympus on Zeus himself.

Atlas talks about the first time he encountered that blade and what he would’ve done if not sentenced to his position by Kratos. Now that they’re both enemies of Olympus, Atlas grants him his magic and helps him reach the Palace of the Fates. Kratos once again fights his way inside, dodging the traps and enemies inside to get reach the sisters, even defeating the kraken that Perseus was supposed to defeat.

Finally reaching the sisters, Kratos proclaims that fate doesn’t work on him and the sisters fight him in a last ditch effort to prevent him from fighting Zeus, expecting the death of Olympus to follow suit. Kratos proceeds anyway and fights the king of the gods on Olympus, but with Athena protecting her father, he misses the opportunity and accidentally kills Athena in the process. She used her dying breath to reveal what Callisto would have revealed in Atlantis about Zeus being his father and urges him to spare Olympus, which was his original goal.

Kratos declares that only Zeus is his target but won’t let anyone get in his way. Calling forth the Titans from the Titanomachy, Kratos declares war on Zeus and any remaining Olympians.

III:

Expecting heavy resistance, Kratos welcomed the challenge brought on by the Olympians, the first of them being Poseidon himself. The sea god is the first to fall and his death negatively impacts bodies of water across the world. Another confrontation with Zeus leads to Gaia losing her hand and Kratos falling to the underworld again after Gaia reveals he was a means to an end for the titans.

Kratos’ circle of allies shrunk rapidly and now that he’s in Hades, the king of the dead isn’t going to let him slip through his fingers again. Armed with the bow of Apollo, recovered from Peirithous’ corpse, Kratos kills Hades which unbinds the souls from the realm of the dead, and leaves the dead in limbo while Kratos gets to use Hades’ titular claws in battle.

Between battles, Kratos encounters the former Olympian smith god, Hephaestus.

Encountering the smith god, Kratos learns about the Flame of Olympus and is encouraged by the spirit of Athena to find it. After battling with Helios and taking his head (and blotting out the sun) Kratos comes across the labyrinth of Daedalus and more than once in this game. While here, the messenger of the gods, Hermes, taunts him as a challenge, despite the Spartan’s best efforts to ignore the little bugger.

For this, Hermes loses his legs and his death causes plague on Olympus. Traveling further, he comes across his stepmother Hera who would happily turn a blind eye to the death of her husband, but when Kratos asks for Pandora, whom Athena tells him is needed to reach her namesake box, she sicks his half brother Hercules on him.

Under the false promise of godhood over the ancillary nonsense from his labors, Hercules attempts to kill Kratos on Hera’s orders, but gets bludgeoned and robbed of his Nemean Cestus. The world now in ruins without the gods to control it, Kratos continues on in search of Pandora to defeat Zeus. This takes him back to Hephaestus who now turns on Kratos when he learns that Pandora is his new target of acquisition. He claims to need the Omphalos Stone to craft a fourth weapon, though Kratos deems it unnecessary considering the number on his hip already.

The stone turns out to be in Chronos’ stomach and is violently torn from his intestines. Kratos caught on to the double cross and once the electric Nemesis Whip is gifted to Kratos, Hephaestus follows through on his double cross and tries to kill him to protect his daughter.

He fails and Kratos continues on alone in search of the girl.

Along the way, he killed Hera for badmouthing Pandora and moved the cubes of Daedalus’ labyrinth causing his death as well. Pandora is found unconscious and when they return to the flame, she attempts to fulfill her fate. Then Zeus returns to stop Kratos from causing further chaos. In a final battle, Pandora attempts again to fulfill her destiny. At first Kratos prevents her but he was goaded by Zeus and let her go. The flame was extinguished and he learns that the box was empty. Now father and son end this rivalry once and for all while Gaia reveals she survived and isn’t happy to learn that her plan had destructive consequences. The battle continues inside the titaness and the two emerge, with the blade impaled in Zeus.

With the last of his might, he sentences Kratos to a nightmare world, but with the power of hope, he breaks free and beats Zeus to death for good this time. The cost of his revenge was the state of humanity, and when told by Athena to transfer his power to her, he takes his own life in defiance. Only Kratos is essentially unkillable and the post-credits scene reveals that he escaped to Midgard while Greece rebuilt likely under Roman supervision.

I omitted and reworked some stuff for this timeline to fit it all in chronological order since some games begin in medias res, but I think I did an okay job of mapping out the greek timeline. I say “timeline” when this is a recounting of the games’ chronology since calendar dates aren’t exactly shown. Mythologies may be based on a version of the truth, but with oral tradition birthing many different versions of the same story, it’s hard to put Kratos in the timeline in a way that doesn’t have him jumping back and forth between events.

Norse Kratos preceding Fimbulwinter makes more sense temporally as scholars and historians believe a real-life world changing event likely caused by a medieval volcanic eruption called the Volcanic Winter of 536 served as an inspiration for the Norse myth of Fimbulwinter. The Greek era prequels’ release order being what it is, one could believe erroneously that Kratos was in two places at once.

So the timeline is faulty, but keeping in mind that most myths are inconsistent, I’d say it tracks. Thankfully, next week, I know what I want to talk about and I have a better research method to use. I won’t reveal too much, but let this picture be a teaser:

Eagle-eyed readers know what to expect, but in case I need to provide a further hint, it’s about a series of video games.

For this week, my channel recommendation is iilluminaughtii, spelled as seen here.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpDmn2FfVYdPIDwRTcf5-OA

The channel, run by a woman named Blair, takes a hard look at companies and corporations and exposes their dirty laundry for all to see. Blair doesn’t give anyone the benefit of the doubt and dispels their friendly image, uncovers a dark history they thought they’d buried under history and legalese, criticizes them for a professed hypocritical message, or any combination of the three and then some. I don’t tune in to all of her videos. Some topics interest me, some don’t. The ones that do interest me, I can’t recommend them highly enough.

On her channel, her introductory video is an in-depth look at why we all hate PETA. Good stuff so far.

Before I leave, I’m gonna try something at the bottom:

Admittedly a censorship test. Sometimes I write these blog posts in public and if a reference image is NSFW/L, then the safer route is the most preferred, if it exists. The next time I bring up a mature series, the censor blocks will be used when I’m certain I won’t get in trouble for it. Some risks aren’t worth it.

Racing Games

TiberiusLeave a comment

“On Speed” by Lightning McQueen

This topic has been in my notes for a few weeks, and up until recently I thought about first talking about what I love most about the racing game genre before listing off my personal best through worst. I should admit, though, that the games chosen for this were chosen partly for nostalgic reasons but also to see how well they hold up. My appreciation for racing games goes back to an old collection of Hot Wheels toys, funny enough.

There was almost no escaping these little cars. While the cars could be found in most pharmacies and dollar stores and in the bargain bin at select department stores, toy stores held the associated sets and tracks and all of them were awesome. Most often, these were battery-powered loops that propel the cars on assembled tracks that go in multiple different directions. I don’t care what anyone says; no matter your opinions on the 2008 Speed Racer movie, toy manufacturers nailed it when they gave us toys and cars based on the movie. Still got nothing on the LEGO sets, though.

I didn’t own the above set, by the way. These things were huge.

To connect the toy cars to the digital cars I raced around in on the TV, these two ran concurrent with each other. I used to collect loads of toy cars and spend a lot of time with racing games, though not to the same extent as the fighting and adventure games. Still, I spent a lot of time with racing games and so for my best through worst:

Best: Midnight Club 3: Dub Edition Remix (2005)

Mid: Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit 2 (2002)

Worst: L.A. Rush (2005)

I think this post will get quite a bit long for each of these three, and before I expand on why I put these games where I put them in lieu of probably better options, this is a personal list that I know won’t walk the same stride as others’ personal lists, I have better memories with these games (emulated or otherwise), and for the game in the Worst category, there are objectively worse games like Crazy Bus or Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing, but those were glorified tech demos that could be written off as a joke like Hong Kong 97. You’d have to put them on the same pedestal as actual games we celebrate or despise and that’s too much for those piles of crap. I don’t like to go for low-hanging fruit. Now for the list.

Midnight Club 3: Dub Edition Remix

This version of the game specifically is what I remember best as the game I finished 100% many times over, and as a personal achievement, I managed to do it on the PS2 emulator with just the keyboard. Thank god for long fingers!

The third in the Midnight Club series it follows up from its predecessors with longer races, more challenges, bigger cities, secrets and easter eggs and more. Customization options and an open world to explore let the player get creative during a race. More than once while driving through the cities, I came across these routes to find secrets or prepare to the best of my ability for a race that would most likely take a certain route.

The Dub Edition tagline for the regular and remix versions for the game stem from the game’s partnership with the car magazine Dub, who spruce up a prize car from a tournament in their style to include the Dodge Magnum, the 2006 Dodge Charger, the Chrysler 300C, the Cadillac Escalade EXT and others. The game has three scaled-down, fictionalized versions of the U.S. cities of San Diego, Atlanta, and Detroit, and the remix version includes the Tokyo Challenge. All three cities are headed by a mechanic and his auto parts garage:

San Diego’s mechanic, Oscar, heads the Six-One-Nine Customs;

Atlanta’s garage is Apone Team Racing run by the garage’s namesake,

And Vince’s garage is in Detroit. No fancy name unfortunately.

For Tokyo, Speedway is the garage there.

As you progress through the career mode, you’re told over a type of transceiver or cell phone that a new racer is in the city ready to challenge you. Racers driving a certain type of car denote a car club they belong to and upon their defeat, they send word of you to the club who invites you to partake in their races for a prize across the three cities. Additionally, tournaments can be entered for prize cars, customized by Dub or open for customization at the garage.

The customization options are quite extensive. Most likely riding the wave of the Fast and Furious franchise, nearly every car can have extensive body work done to it, essentially turning a station wagon into a supercar and earning you even more speeding tickets because none of the cars you have are street legal anymore. Imagine explaining that to the traffic cops…

The car classes and types matter mainly to the car clubs stateside, but in the remix version with Tokyo included, there are class and car type specific tournaments, and the kicker is that you don’t necessarily have to finish the American races first before flying to Japan. The first tournament you’re offered will require a vehicle class not available until you’re 4/5 done with Detroit, but the way you unlock tournaments in Tokyo is that instead of challenging individual racers, street races which are represented by red dots in the States are represented by purple diamonds, three of which unlock the next tournament. So theoretically, you can complete some races in the US, head to Japan and complete a tournament there, then come back to the US with the prize car, rinse and repeat.

Then, there’s the soundtrack, which couldn’t be anymore mid-2000s. Hip hop artists, post-grunge bands, techno bands, electro-pop; as I recall, select genres went hand-in-hand with the underground racing scene as depicted in media. I have no idea if this was representative of the lifestyle back then, but if so then that’s pretty cool. It makes the replays all the more enjoyable to watch.

The car clubs have an extra feature for certain cars. Specific types can gain one of three abilities: Zone, Agro, and Roar. Zone is a type of Max Payne-like slow motion ability that allows the Tuner cars, Exotic cars, Sports Bikes and select Luxury Sedans to weave through traffic in slow mo. This ability is earned by driving as clean as possible through the city. Agro is applicable to the rest of the Sedans and SUVs and is a type of boost that allows the driver to slam through traffic at a breakneck pace, breaking necks with all the wreckage caused by ramming other cars off the streets. Driving into other cars and causing general damage is how you earn this ability. Roar is exclusive to Muscle Cars and Choppers and it sends a blast of wind to scatter heavy traffic out of the way. Drifting and power sliding unlocks this ability. All three can be used a total of five times, and going by my playthrough of each ability, they’re not meant to be a one-size-fits-all solution when a race goes sideways. Zone helps you get through traffic, but it builds up as slow as its ability performs and a single crash can set the bar down as it accumulates. The draw of Agro ability is that you can send offending vehicles to the moon and the impact is literally diminished if you activate it on a free road. The same goes for Roar, but the consequences are doubly so if the vehicles don’t spread out how you hope. You have to think a bit more strategically before activating either of these three.

Lastly, there’s the secrets. The three U.S. cities have RockStar logos that net you extra customization options in the garage from more riders on bikes, to license plates to decals and more.

Above all, not only do I recommend it, I highly recommend you set up your controller if you go the emulation route. Contorting your fingers like miniature twister is better as a party trick than to play games. I write from experience.

Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit 2

My next words on this game specifically will surely sound a bit contradictory depending on how you see racing games. The customization options giving me a range of choices heavily influenced my rating of Midnight Club 3 despite me spending less time with it. Need for Speed has little in the way of customization, there’s no overarching plot to become a legendary racer in the underground street racing scene, and the options for cars and tracks is so limited that it’s nonexistent.

That being said, I’m still playing this game and the game modes on display do a lot to make up for what I thought was so perfect about MC3. Granted, NFS HP2 came out in Q4 2002 while MC3 was released around Spring 2005, so older racing games will feel like clean-picked skeletons compared to what would succeed them all, but judging games of this era by their own merits reveals that they’re less about style and more about substance. Midnight Club drips style, but Need for Speed before the EA corruption of the 2010s leaks substance.

Multiple game modes and challenges can be completed and the departure from other games is that there isn’t always an emphasis on getting perfect scores. Some challenges will still let you advance even if you finish in second place. As another divergent example from what’s expected of Midnight Club, transmission systems can be adjusted to suit the player depending on the car: automatic, manual, and semiautomatic transmission. The game is also designed more around skills than simply picking up and playing.

You know how Midnight Club has precise locations based on real-world cities, just scaled down massively from what residents of each would recognize of them (especially for 2005)? Well, the maps in Need for Speed are less precise and more like general amalgamations of a city in a given location. The Mediterranean coastline, the Pacific coast, Australia, the American Southwest, etc. The game also feels less like a smorgasbord of real-life cars and car concepts that with the benefit of hindsight didn’t always pan out.

This concept H3T, for instance, is different from what was sold in 2005 and ‘6, by the way. As a matter of fact, the car brands in NFS were less luxurious and well known and more specific to certain regions if not known to the wider car aficionado demographic. Opel, the now-defunct HSV, one of Ford’s foreign manufacturers, all feature in the game. The cars that you start off with tend to have a top speed of around 125 MPH with an average 0-60 acceleration rate of 5.3 seconds. The further down the line you advance, the top speed rounds to around 200 MPH with a shorter rate of acceleration. With the speeding cars comes new ways to maneuver around the tracks.

Speaking of the tracks, going back to a comment I made about the cars in MC3 losing street legality, they’d all be suited for a race track like how they’re all designed in this game. The tracks within NFS Hot Pursuit all have secret pathways and shortcuts to take but depending on the version you have it may be somewhat different. I emulated the PS2 version and pirated the PC version and the menu selection screens are all different; the PS2 version seemed to be the snazziest of all the available versions, whereas the PC, Xbox, and GameCube layouts are all the same.

Skills play a role in more than just driving and handling. The Hot Pursuit game modes where cops are placed at different points along the track can add an extra layer of difficulty to the challenge and you’ll normally only have that split-second to decide how to avoid them. NFS has a reset button for when you screw up during the race, but in my experience it there are less opportunities to use it during Hot Pursuit mode because the police will catch up to you and ticket you. So best to save those for when you’re out of sight of the police or outside Hot Pursuit mode.

The cops in this game are also aggressive. They’re not GTA-aggressive, but as I recall, in the PC version they’ll deploy helicopters the longer you resist. I know they also do that in the PS2 version though I rarely keep them around for that long to find out. This mode isn’t one sided though — there’s a mode to play as the cop and nab speeding racers as well.

I don’t know if this is true of all EA games from before or even now but their design philosophy, considering Medal of Honor, Need for Speed here, and Battlefield seemed to be based partly or wholly on gaining and refining skills than button-mashing throughout the whole play session. This isn’t a philosophy that’ll resonate with everyone and EA has since divorced themselves from this for darker desires in recent memory, but as I said with Midnight Club 3, find a way to play it and see the game for yourself. It might be too your taste if Midnight Club proves too flashy.

L.A. Rush:

This game is why this blog topic exists. It’s because I hate this game so much that I decided to write this week’s topic. Thing is, for years, I’d never had the words to illustrate my gripes with this game until recently. The YouTube channel BlueTag did the digging and the review on what this game has to offer because I knew damn well I wasn’t gonna put this tripe in my emulator, so here’s the corresponding video.

To spoil the video a bit, this game was developed by Midway Games’ British branch in Newcastle, the same Midway Games that flooded arcades from the 1980s until their 2010 bankruptcy, gave us Mortal Kombat and the subsequent ESRB rating system, and surprise sleepers like SpyHunter and Stranglehold. According to BlueTag, the finer details surrounding development are lost to history, but the game’s inner workings hint at a severe lack of communication between internal departments.

The physics engine is incredibly flimsy for a racing game let alone driving. Slip a finger on the accelerator and the car will hit the nearest wall at Mach 4, with reciprocal results. Forget tanks for cars that could take a beating; this game cinematically emphasizes the damage that comes with totaling the car when this happens.

Funny enough, the main protagonist is supposed to have a fleet of cars, but there’s only one that features prominently in the game at the beginning. L.A. Rush is another game sponsored by a major car promoter, this time MTV’s Pimp My Ride with Xzibit and Lil Jon in tow, but unlike Dub, Pimp My Ride doesn’t have much to offer. Or rather, the Dub team will let you win cars done by them where as PMR often upgrades your ride without you seeing the bodywork or messing around with it until it’s finished. You also stand to lose half your cash to a ride whose paintjob is a surprise until the end.

Speaking of money, you have to pay an entry fee to compete in a race and if you mess up and want to start over and do better, you can’t restart the race from the menu. You have to back out and come back in and pay the entry fee again. Like the other games, cops also play a role in this game but considering the consequences in the other games, this is simultaneously a worse and lax punishment at the same time: it’s lax because you bribe the cops to get them to back off, but it’s worse because you lose money on entry fees anyway so this is another way to lose your money.

Cutscenes meanwhile show the protagonist, whose name I never registered, I think his name was T or something, having already achieved street racer heaven. Then the bad guy shows up, promising to take your stuff which he does. After a few weeks, your cars are all confiscated including the jet black Hummer you rock up to the mansion in, leaving you with a suburban sedan that you have to use to get your cars back, often while under pursuit, and with the crappy physics and whatnot, this is more of a chore than anything.

As for the map, I’m not a native Angeleno, but I’ve heard from the Wikipedia article, that a section of L.A., namely the Valley was absent. Seems weird to put in, but in a racing game a map and layout can make or break a race if not the whole game and what I presume to be a notable location within the L.A. region was done a disservice by its omission. If this is the case, then whatever could’ve been done with the Valley may have killed further interest.

All things considered, if eight year old me was smart enough to see the problems with this back then it should be a warning to how unplayable a game could be, especially the PC port which I learned was worse off than the console version. If you have that Tibetan Buddhist level of patience, give it a go. If not, watch the gameplay and prepare yourself for outdated, cringey dialog, even for a game from the mid-2000s.

Before I move on to the YouTube recommendations, I want to mention a last minute game I also played on the PS2 back in the day, but have fewer moments with: Gran Turismo 4.

My memories with this are hazy as of now, but if I get the chance to emulate and play it, I’ll surely put my thoughts in, no questions asked.

Now for the channel recommendation: Rev says desu. This channel is a commentary channel on mostly anime and anime news and often features the wrong opinions to laugh at and lambast from some of the worst people to speak on a given matter on Twitter. Originally shortform in length, Rev has gotten around to longer videos for more to discuss. Wherever you start, if you like his content be sure to subscribe to him, he makes videos regularly.

https://www.youtube.com/@Revsaysdesu

The Elusive Samurai

Tiberius2 Comments

The life and times of Hojo Tokiyuki

Clawing out of the deep recesses like the happiest Spartan breaking free from Hades wasn’t without its few perks. To date, this is the third manga presented to me by Viz, so if it feels as though they’re sponsoring me, they aren’t. But I’d be open to covering the works they’re allowed to license to the west if the opportunity comes knocking especially now that two of those series are set for anime releases in the near future: this series and the one about the zombie or something. I don’t know…

But while Bad Luck Unkillable has a trailer with voice over and all that, Running from the Samurai in Medieval Japan only gave us a teaser trailer which works for me as I have as much time as I feel is appropriate to play catch-ups with the manga.

For research on this post, I’ve had to skim through and remind myself of who’s who, while also brushing up on this period of Japanese history, so wherever there’s a mistake, I’ll amend and correct it once I read up on both. The premise of The Elusive Samurai is thus: the Hojo clan, who held sway over the shogunate and sent most of their own members to work with the imperial family and court, is represented by their two members, current shikken (regent) Hojo Takatoki and his son and heir, Hojo Tokiyuki. Ambitious members of the Ashikaga samurai clan allied with the Emperor Go-Daigo in an attempt to return the imperial court to its seat of power, i.e. overthrow the Hojo-ruled Kamakura shogunate in favor of the emperor. During festivities, the Ashikaga launch their siege on Kamakura and nearly exterminate the Hojo clan. When the dust settles, the Ashikaga realize that the heir, now-shogun, Hojo Tokiyuki has survived and escaped. With the Ashikaga now in power, they use their resources to hunt down and exterminate the boy and every one of his allies.

Brief history lesson: on paper, the imperial court sat at the top of the pillar with the most power, followed by the shogunate, and while they were in power, the shikken. In reality, the Hojo clan shikkens were more powerful than both the shogunate and the imperial court combined. This was the result of the 12th century Genpei War that pitted the Taira and Minamoto clans against each other. Minamoto no Yoritomo won out and as part of the spoils of victory, the imperial court behaved as a figurehead, a position that Go-Daigo was clearly not happy with, hence the Kenmu Restoration’s goal of reversing these circumstances. Fun fact: Kublai Khan found this out the hard way in the lead up to military actions against the imperial court and shogunate when the Mongol-led Yuan dynasty attempted to add the Japanese islands to their list of possessions. Couldn’t go east in the long run so he went hard west.

And thus we learned from the Mongols why it pays to think very hard about an amphibious invasion. Back to the manga, over the course of the Kenmu Restoration period, Tokiyuki-sama embarks on a quest to gain allies and build a force of formidable warriors who can return the Hojo clan to their former glory. It might go in a different direction in the long run considering in real life, the Kenmu Restoration was short-lived and to my interpretation the Ashikaga turned on Go-Daigo and restored the shogunate long enough to stay in power until 1573. Interestingly, this created a split in the historicity of the Japanese emperor’s line of succession briefly with Japan holding two capitals until the Azuchi-Momoyama period.

Seriously, I’ve gotta stop jumping the gun here. Alright, so Tokiyuki isn’t completely alone in his quest. He starts out with a few retainers at his side and actually has support from the head of the nearby Suwa clan in the form of Suwa Yorishige who I believe is loosely inspired by the samurai of the same name, though the real life Suwa Yorishige succeeds the fictional one by two centuries. Also, manga Yorishige is reimagined as medieval Japanese Nostradamus with all his predictions about the future and funny enough common manga tropes. Makes me think of Koro-sensei though more self-aware of the manga he’s in.

Structurally, I see a bunch of references to JRPGs like Chrono Trigger or early Final Fantasy. Protagonist with a long term goal, comrades at his side, godlike guide, encroaching force of evil closing in from all sides; the comrades especially exhibit several archetypes in several RPGs, the thief, the brute, the mage, etc. If I was alive in the 1980s, I probably wouldn’t have imagined how many manga series became franchises with spin-offs and video games in tow, but if I had Yorishige’s level of foresight and I could see Dragon Ball getting video games and all that, then I think I can also see other manga following suit. Whether The Elusive Samurai follows suit remains to be seen, but even if it was a fan creation, I could see an Elusive Samurai RPG-style game soon. It’s also worth noting that the art style and writing will feel familiar to fans of Assassination Classroom and that’s because it’s from the same man: Yusei Matsui. Overall, by itself, it seems to be having fun with the historical setting and subject material. Taking the piss outta historical figures is a worldwide pastime, after all. In comparison with Kill School, the most comparable thing they have is the femboy protagonist. Not sure if that’s Matsui’s bread and butter, but these days that might be the case.

The YouTube channel recommendations are coming back for April. Also, Tomorrow being April Fool’s Day, I’ll cover Toonami and Adult Swim’s yearly tradition when those stars align. Look forward to that.

Boruto’s Contrast with Naruto

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Three updates so soon

This was about to be last week’s post, but I didn’t think it fair to talk about the same thing thrice in such a short amount of time. I’d been meaning to move onto other manga/anime/entertainment, etc. and I don’t really want to be the Boruto guy. I take in as much of the series as I can when I can, but I don’t want to sound like it’s the only thing I take in; my previous posts suggest otherwise.

That being said, the above meme gets to the heart of what this post will be about and the fanfare from the release of the latest chapter on Sunday put so much of the community into a frenzy that there were more people who read Boruto than One Piece.

At one point, the Boruto fans claimed the last chapter alone trounced all of One Piece which isn’t so much a shot for the moon from the Earth as it’s a shot to the sun from Planet X. I liked the last chapter a lot, but I wouldn’t say it was that good.

As for the topic this week: Momoshiki’s prediction in like Volume 3 of the manga comes true in the most recent chapter. I’ll put links down below so that readers can see for themselves what he’s been talking about all along:

https://www.viz.com/shonenjump/boruto-chapter-79/chapter/26473

https://w2.boruto-online.com/manga/boruto-manga-chapter-79/

And for those of you who care little for spoilers, picking up from 77 and 78, after Kawaki comes to the conclusion that the life of a shinobi is not a pleasant one, he prefaces his plans to Naruto and Hinata by announcing first that in any other circumstance he would never wish harm against Boruto, but him being part Ohtsutsuki and a vessel for Momoshiki to boot has forced hand, literally as we see later. Distraught, neither the Seventh Hokage nor his wife take kindly to Kawaki’s plans and the boy, expecting this resistance, sends the pair to another dimension, hoping to complete his mission unimpeded by the Hidden Leaf Village’s most powerful ninja.

Catching up to Boruto and Sarada, Kawaki strikes, awarding Boruto his new scar only to be apprehended by Sasuke, Shikamaru, and Mitsuki. However, it’s established in an earlier chapter that when Boruto’s chakra reserves are diminished, Momoshiki takes control, as noted by the Jougan’s appearance in Boruto’s right eye. Kawaki breaks free and flees. Eida senses danger coming his way, and catches up to him. Unconsciously, she activates a shinjutsu or god technique known as Omnipotence that reverses Boruto’s and Kawaki’s roles: Kawaki is the one who’s now the son of Naruto Uzumaki and Hinata Hyuga, while Boruto is the nobody, the outcast vessel of Kara and Isshiki Ohtsutsuki while he controlled Jigen’s body.

It’s also worth mentioning that the Boruto anime, which airs on Sundays, released a new episode the same day as Chapter 79, so fans got a glimpse of what Momoshiki meant when he made his prophecy while also watching Kawaki try the first time to rid the world of Momoshiki’s presence. I know they’re not meant to be the highlight of Boruto anymore, but the OG Team 7 and the Sixth Hokage could simply tell Kawaki and the new Team 7 why killing an Ohtsutsuki is so tough. It’s like fighting a necromancer: if you kill the necromancer and it’s easy, you didn’t kill him. Am I right, Quan Chi?

So now that we have this set up, I want to try to make predictions. With the announcement a few weeks ago that Boruto’s Part 1 was ending soon, what we know so far is that Boruto lost everything. He’s his father’s son in appearance and often personality, but Naruto grew up a few years and change after the Third Shinobi War ended. Select shinobi who taught or de facto raised him like Kakashi and Jiraiya are war veterans themselves from that conflict or an earlier conflict; Kakashi himself was a child soldier from the Third War. Including teachers, the OG characters from Naruto are in some manner a victim of loss on either a wide or miniature scale.

Boruto doesn’t know that world and neither does his generation. Relatively speaking there’s peace all around, except for one or two bands of rogue ninja. Fifteen years after the devastation of the Fourth Shinobi War, and the peace that Nagato, Jiraiya, and everyone ever wanted has come to fruition thanks in no small part to the will of a knuckleheaded ninja. As a result, Boruto’s generation doesn’t need more shinobi to fill in a gap or because there’s a war on the horizon in need of some fresh meat; it’s mostly general security and escort missions or at least that’s how they always begin. A simple security mission can easily turn sour depending on several conditions. Remember the Mujina bandits?

Now that Boruto’s lost everything he’s ever had, the only route fans can see going forward is that Boruto follows the path of a rogue shinobi, like Sasuke did but with a significant point of divergence. Sasuke chose to acquire power from Orochimaru to get revenge on Itachi; Boruto had this move forced on him by an omnipotent power that honestly no one understands all that well. Another adverse effect of the Omnipotence shinjutsu is that Ohtsutsuki members and their vessels don’t succumb to Eida’s charm ability. Interestingly, Sumire and Sarada are also immune to this ability, which some on r/Boruto have theorized that since she treated these two as friends, they were spared that outcome.

Call it a miscalculation, but has anything good ever happened when children activate godly powers? In all seriousness, this would mean that one or both of them is likely to join up with Boruto for the foreseeable future while he plots to undo Kawaki’s crimes. Whether this extends to the remnants of the Ohtsutsuki remains to be seen. Sarada might go with Boruto, but if her father falls under the same charm as most people then he’ll likely fight her tooth and nail to keep her in the village. Sakura as well.

Sumire could also join Boruto’s quest since the anime gave her a burden of her own to deal with early on in the show’s run in the form of Nue and her father’s connection to the Foundation, the ANBU cell independent of the Hokage’s control. But this could also go wrong as the show rectified the rampage from that arc and allowed her to return to the life she’d gained in the Ninja Academy, even letting her work as an assistant to Dr. Katasuke Tohno in the manga.

These would be unlikely if they join Boruto in defiance of the Hidden Leaf Jonin. If it were a mission, since Boruto is now perceived as an enemy at the terrorist level, it would be an A-rank mission with S-rank potential and only the most advanced level shinobi would be selected for such a mission. It’s not like when Shikamaru’s rag-tag team fought off the Sound Ninja 4 to get Sasuke back. They village might choose to see it as potentially more dangerous, even for a Chunin like Sarada.

But if they see her potential and do what Hiruzen did with Itachi and make it an undercover/double agent mission like the Uchiha Clan Downfall, then I could see it happening… under Naruto and in response to what happened to his son. Assuming Shikamaru becomes interim Hokage or Kakashi or Tsunade return to their roles, they’d be under the influence of Omnipotence and Shikamaru has shown himself to be way more risk-averse as advisor to the Hokage. Just as he’d wanted to do to Kawaki, he probably won’t stop until Boruto is apprehended, however that comes about.

Also consider the reaction/response to come from the Hyuga clan when they find out their former heiress is missing, or whether the Omnipotence transcends dimensions. Hanabi and Hiashi are the only two Hyuga clan members to appear in the anime and I don’t think ever in the Boruto manga. Compared to the other Hidden Leaf clans, the Hyuga are still intact and kicking, especially with members of theirs amongst the regular Hidden Leaf Jonin in other aspects. A large pool of veteran shinobi to answer to this emergency should be expected.

In the meantime, with Himawari now technically an orphan, she might be taken into the Hyuga clan grounds for her protection and further training as an established academy student and aspiring shinobi. She does have the Byakugan unlike her brother and if they deem her ready, may induct her as a shinobi no different than the others who serve the Hidden Leaf Village.

If Omnipotence transcends dimensions, then that means Kawaki is safe in the short-term but screwed in the long-term. He advised Eida to report Naruto and Hinata (who are in another dimension remember) dead, so he and Eida could be in it if they find out that it’s a lie.

This all remains to be seen, though. We have until April 20 to see what happens, and I may have more material to write about. You know how I wrote up above that I didn’t really want to be seen as the Boruto guy? That might be in my future the more I bring it up. But again we’ll have to wait and see.